Sunbyanyname

If you are amused at the title of this post being similar to the 17th century poet John Milton’s famous last line in the sonnet ‘When I Consider How My Light is Spent’, the similarity, I hasten to add, is intentional. As we go along, you will understand.

The business end of the navy is at sea and that is where you want to be; that’s where there is life, order, sanity and some justification for being what you are: a sea-warrior. However much you dislike, you can’t be at sea all the time and have to serve ashore some time or the other. And whilst ashore, you have to either serve at headquarters or deal with one. That’s the time you learn, if you are doing it for the first time, how different navy life can be; you acquire a totally different perspective and environment (Earlier, I have written two articles on the subject: ‘The Tail Wags The Dog And How!’ and ‘The Tail Wags The Dog And How! – Part II’)

Ten days ago, the Navy was in the news for having appointed a Flag Officer Delhi Area (FODA) without the consent of the Ministry of Defence (MoD). MoD, unlike what people think, is actually a fighting or combat organisation. It is at all times at war with the armed forces. Here, however, it patted itself on the back (something that it has mastered over years) for having caught the Navy on the wrong foot. The Navy justified the appointment, but, insisted that FODA is now to be called Flag Officer Administration:

“We required such an office as we are very soon going to start work on the construction of Nau Sena Bhawan which will be a big task and otherwise also, the workload had gone up quite considerably in the national capital,” senior Navy sources explained. (The pic on top is of the foundation stone laying ceremony on 20 Aug 14).

The tail is now considerably larger and the poor dog at sea (sea-dog) is ready to be wagged violently and continuously.

In the Naval Headquarters at New Delhi the phrase Navy is not a vocation but a way of life is not entirely reflective of the true picture; for most it is a nine-to-five office job. The gap between theory and practice there is even greater than between the peninsular India and the land-locked capital. One of my course-mates, for example, landed up at NHQ immediately after undergoing the Staff Course at DSSC, Wellington (Nilgiris). In the staff course, he was converted into a Sahib with such theoretical things as Whitehall system of filing and other norms of handling correspondence. At the end of his first day, as he approached me in my ramshackle office (I had joined about a year before him and hence knew my way around there), he had tears in his eyes. Let alone not being able to locate a single file as per the Whitehall system, he was unable to find a chair or table for himself.

They also serve who are in Naval Headquarters!

I remember how amused I myself was when I attended my first meeting at NHQ on the all important topic of ‘The use of Hemp ropes on board ships’. The meeting was to start at 2:30 PM immediately after lunch. By about 3 PM everyone had trickled in except Commander A Singh. The chairman of the meeting, a senior Commodore, waited for everyone without once losing his temper. On the ships, he would have taken everyone’s pants off for keeping him waiting even for five minutes. Now, here, he was just drumming his table and asking, “Should we wait for A Singh or start the meeting?” and the senior officers around him kept saying, “Lets wait for A Singh”. By 3:15 PM, the Commodore’s limit of patience had been reached and he said, “Lets not wait for A Singh anymore. Lets start the meeting. He can join in when he comes.” Everyone acquiesced with this decision. The Commodore began the meeting by welcoming everyone and then he asked for someone to read out the minutes of the last meeting. Everyone said that there was a problem here since the minutes had not been circulated by A Singh (In NHQ, I quickly learnt that the absent member is to be blamed for everything. After leaving the Navy, when I joined the corporate sector, once I attended a meeting in the North Block (the business end of the government; the MoD and the armed forces headquarters are in the South Block) on the issue of ‘Security of SBMs’ (Single Buoy Moorings; whereat great percentage of crude oil is received from VLCCs or Very Large Crude Carriers). The chairman kept saying that this security had been handed over to XYZ. No one had any objection to it. I was quick to notice that the XYZ representatives weren’t attending the meeting. When I pointed this out, it was explained to me that it was deliberate since if the XYZ reps were to attend the meeting, they would have serious objections to it; now, they would learn of the decision through the minutes of the meeting. Naturally, in Naval Headquarters, we quickly learn the ways of our civilian counterparts rather than making them learn our disciplined and orderly ways). After an hour of the meeting on the subject of ‘Use of hemp ropes on ships’ the meeting was called off since A Singh, the most important member of the meeting hadn’t arrived.

They also serve who are in Naval Headquarters!

If you are wondering what I alluded to by the ways of the civilians in the last paragraph, I would like to point out that these are not just to be seen at the top levels. At the ground level (almost all the secretarial staff in the directorates is civilians), it is to be seen to be believed. My office clerk, for example, vanished for 114 days without informing me and I had to do most of my typing myself. When I pointed this to the DOA (Directorate of Administration) guys, they said due to manpower shortages, no relief could be provided. How about taking action against the clerk? They said this would be possible when the clerk would report back on duty. There is never any urgency for anything at the headquarters; things get sorted out on their own.

What about the gallant sailors who do wonders on the ships, who produce results against all odds? Well, in Naval Headquarters, these are mostly from North Indian states who are on home or closer-to-home postings. They are, therefore, least likely to complain about anything even if asked to fetch canteen items or movie tickets.

If I have painted a somewhat dismal environment of Naval Headquarters, I hasten to correct the view that great and difficult things actually happen at the headquarters. Whilst the Navy at sea is only preparing or training to fight against the enemy, in Naval Headquarters, the guys are actually fighting to obtain things for the Navy from the Ministry or ministries. How important this exercise is can be made out from the awards and honours list: a large percentage of those serving in Naval Headquarters find their names in the list.

They also serve who are in Naval Headquarters!

A few years back, when I was still in the Navy, the citation of a Commodore for Nausena Medal (Devotion to Duty) actually read that: “He obtained sanction for ‘ABC’ from the ministry against all odds, thereby accomplishing something beyond the ordinary call of duty.”

The Navy is a combat service, indeed; the MoD ensures we stay that way.

If the title suggests to you that we went around with our Kodak or Agfa cameras (the prevalent models in the 1970s) to take pictures of our favourite film-stars like Dilip Kumar, Dev Anand, Vyjayanthimala or Nutan, you are as far away from the mark as someone who thinks pineapple is an apple-like fruit that grows on the pine trees. Worse, if you think, we – the navy officers – had decided to get rid of the bad guys or the villains in the Indian movies from Jeevan to Pran to Amjad Khan in Sholay and carried guns for that specific purpose, once again, you are wrong.

Shooting Stars is simply the process of bringing down to the horizon the images with the help of a marine sextant (see picture) of some of the 57 navigational stars given in the nautical almanac at the times of morning and evening nautical twilights (when both the stars and the horizon can be seen by the naked eye), thus measuring their exact angle with the earth’s horizon in degrees, arcminutes and arcseconds. The idea was to fix the position of a ship at sea, far from shore objects, in comparison to the known position of some of these 57 navigational stars. Naturally, in order to fix the position of the ship with some accuracy, one would have to get more than two bearing lines. The accuracy and the fastness of the observations would ensure that most of the bearing lines (from more than two stars) would meet at a point and that would be the fixed position of the ship. Without boring you with complex details, this in essence is the theory of the celestial navigation, also known as astronavigation. During our formative years in the navy, all of us had to learn the intricacies of the astronavigation.

What about daytime? you will ask me. Well, one would shoot the sun! Aha, but sun is only one, you will persist. Yes, thank God, it is only one. However, if you measure the angle of the sun at different times of the day, allow for the changes in dead-reckoning (or DR) positions of the ship, you will get as many bearing lines as the number of times you shoot the sun, and then, once again, you can fix the ship. Fair enough, you will now ask, but, what exactly is a dead reckoning (DR) position. If you ain’t seeing the stars until now, a DR position is:

the process of calculating one’s current position by using a previously determined position, or fix, and advancing that position based upon known or estimated speeds over elapsed time and course. The corresponding term in biology, used to describe the processes by which animals update their estimates of position or heading, is path integration.

I remember the time, when I underwent my higher-command course with the army at Mhow, and we joked about army in the mountains advancing with the speed of the mules (they provide logistic support to the army and no army can reach a place or sustain itself unless and until the mules carrying the logistics have cought up). We used to have any number of cartoons about the pongos (naval slang for army infantry guys) and mules. Little did the army guys know that some of our own methods also originated from the animals!

If you are with me so far, with or without stars in your eyes, you would then ask me if we already have the DR position, why to then further fix the ship? Well, DR positions are nowhere near being accurate. As with the animals, you would have to track all the various paths and speeds that the animal took and then arrive at his/her final position after a few hours. First of all it would depend upon the accuracy of the initial position and then on the accuracy of measurement of all the courses and speeds and drifts due to currents and winds and then arrive at the final position.

For example, lets say, the three or more plotted lines if they don’t meet at one point, they would form between them a figure called cocked-hat. Most often than not, all of us busying ourselves in astronavigation would land up with more cocked-hats than in the complete wardrobe of, say, Nelson.

Hence, astronavigation was for us the process of finding the ship’s position more accurately than the dead-reckoning (DR) position. A final question that you would ask me is that weren’t there modern technological means available to fix the ship? Well, there were, but, we were to learn astronavigation just-in-case in the same manner as we kept learning sails and masts even after the advent of steam-ships.

Finally, I might as well tell you that being at sea is very much different from anything that you can imagine. You have no idea of how lost you can get after spending a few hours or days at sea. All directions appear the same and there is nothing to differentiate one from the other. The only analogy that I can give you is the one given by my armoured course mates (how the poor guys miss out on becoming the army chiefs unless it is by accident!) in desert warfare; at times you have no idea of whether you are coming or going. Anyway, let me add that this confusion of being at sea has led Fleet Navigating Officers (the most qualified navigators in the fleet) of leading an entire fleet into waters and even harbours different from the ones that they had intended (as an example, please read: ‘Poor Communicator Had The Last Laugh’). In a major tactical exercise at sea, as another example, when the fleet at sea was divided into Red (enemy) and Blue (own) forces, two ships of the Blue forces encountered each other after going on different tracks and shot missiles at each other thinking of the other as Red ship.

A navy officer, of my era or earlier, would therefore be well versed with recognising navigational stars at sea and would rattle out star names such as Sirius, Rigel, Betelgeuse, Pollux, Aldebaran, Capella, Spica, Arcturus and the Belt of Orion simply by looking at the sky.

Other than that, let me assure you, there is a vast difference between the theory and the practice. For those of you who think it is ancient and outdated, let me tell you that the most modern navy in the world – the US Navy – discontinued (in part only) celestial navigation being taught to its officers in formative years only. And what is the part that they discontinued? Well, the part of physically calculating and drawing bearing lines ( a 22 step process that we all learnt). Instead, nowadays, the shooting star data (the physical data) is fed into a computer and a fix is obtained almost instantly. There are clearly advantages in astronavigation such as its signals cannot be jammed or stopped (unlike that of a radar or even satellite), it is globally available (stars and sun are available everywhere) and the process doesn’t give out any signals that can be detected by the enemy.

However, the inaccuracies of the process (two people are required at the same time to shoot stars: one for bringing the star to the horizon and the other for accurately noting the time of the observation with a chronometer) are many such as inaccurately calibrated sextant or chronometer, great inaccuracies in the last known position, misidentified stars, horizon not being clear due to many reasons (such as choppy seas) and inaccuracies in calculating and plotting. And these led to some hilarious situations at sea.

One that we had often heard was about these young Royal Navy officers trying out celestial navigation in the Thames river in the olden days. After the position calculated by them was plotted on the chart, the Navigator told them gravely that they would have to remove their hats as the ship had landed up in the middle of Saint Paul’s Cathedral.

In our case too, many a times the fix was plotted on the land. Minutes and even hours of shooting stars or the sun, calculating and plotting, would be of no use to the ship.

During my higher command course with the army, the only use for the navy that my army course mates found was to help them in their operations on land. Little did they know how often we had been helping them during the course of astronavigation by landing our ships just next to where they were busy fighting land battles!

Submariners are a class apart. They are cooler than the arctic ice that you saw in the movie Ice Station Zebra in which Rock Hudson played Commander James Ferraday, Captain of the US attack submarine USS Tigerfish. Some of you who saw the movie would recall that the movie was ostensibly about rescuing British personnel on a drifting ice weather station in the arctic but actually about a classified intelligence mission. There was this scene in the movie when Commander Ferraday welcomes ‘Mr. Jones‘, the British intelligence agent on board by telling him, “Here on this boat, we are very informal. Everyone is known by his first name. My first name is ‘Captain’.”  How cool that sounded. Well, submariners are like that.

Before they join the branch, there is a special psychology and psychiatrist test for them to qualify; for, if they ain’t the cool type, amongst other attributes, they can commit fatal mistakes in the closed confines of a submarine (In the F class of submarines, for example, the sailor on watch in the DG compartment didn’t have space enough to stand erect). Our famous tall submariner is Admiral VS Shekhawat. His bunk was extended by more than a foot on the submarine so that he could at least sleep properly. He was my CO on a ship and he was cooler than any cucumber.

Anyway, I hope you got the point about the submariners being the coolest of the cats.

What do all of us in the Navy do when we are not at sea? You would expect us to be enjoying life (“Coolex” as the navy men say it; the suffix ‘ex’ is used for exercises. Hence, TACEX would be a tactical exercise. In the same manner, ‘Coolex‘ would mean an exercise in cooling one’s heels!) or twiddling our thumbs. Far from it. Half of us are busy writing reports of the exercises done at sea (most of us return ashore bleary-eyed since the naval authorities are convinced that the time at sea is very costly for the nation and every minute must be made use of). The other half is given to such tasks as the ones ashore should have been doing but being overworked, they have to reluctantly pass it on to the people on the ships after they have enjoyed themselves doing nothing at sea.

One of the tasks given to me when I was commanding my boat Vipul was to conduct a Board of Inquiry into circumstances leading to an Assistant Logistic Officer (ALO) by the name of Lieutenant Devgun having walked away with Rupees 33 Lakhs from the accounts of the Submarine Base in Mumbai (COMCOS (West)). I was one of the members (a BoI normally has three members including the President). Our President was then Captain (later Rear Admiral) Kochhar, CO of the carrier Vikrant. And then we had a Logistic Officer, Commander Anand, who had all rules and regulations concerning accounts at the back of his hand.

To complete the background, I must mention that the rear wall of any BoI and Court Martial room has to have a picture of the President of India in his capacity as the Supreme Commander of the armed forces.

As we commenced the BoI, we realised that the cool submariners had left everything to the super cool Devgun. The Logistic Officer, Devgun’s immediate boss, for example, had become an expert at solving crosswords since he totally trusted his assistant Devgun to handle accounts, cash, money warrant, ledgers, and locking unlocking of the money safe held in his personal custody. All the others in the Base were equally cool about trusting Devgun with even surprise muster of accounts. He not just maintained Imprest Account but others, busy as they were, coolly disposed off even the handling of their Non-Public Fund accounts to him. The more we went into their coolness, the more we realised that anything and everything had been left to the man with a gun and the Hindi name for god in his name.

Indeed, the President of the BoI mentioned during one of the tea-breaks conjectured as to why couldn’t they have madee him the COMCOS (Commodore Commanding Submarines) since Devgun virtually did everything as a Lieutenant; and, he had risen to this rank from being a sailor?

More and more skeletons came out of the submariners’ cupboards as we took up one thread or the other. As an example, lets say there was a party at the Submarine Base. Who do you think did the local purchase of things required for the party? Well, you have easily guessed it; the cool submariners’ most trusted officer Devgun did it and made underhand money there too (as if 33 Lakh rupees (a huge sum during those days) wasn’t enough). Finally, we decided that we would have to restrict the scope of the BoI since it was otherwise becoming gargantuan with no end in sight. We informed the command headquarters accordingly.

One day, one of the witnesses (a woman) brought out that Devgun was also running a Chit Fund with the promise of making everyone rich. Whilst her evidence was being recorded, we had a tea-break. During the tea-break, the President enquired from the lady stenographer given to us to record the proceedings (in shorthand) (she was a steno at the submarine base itself) about this Chit Fund. She mentioned that many women employees of the Base had given him money for the Chit Fund so as to become rich. She also shyly suggested that many had even illicit relations with him.

On an impulse, the President BoI asked her if she too had lent money to him for the Chit Fund. She lowered her eyes and nodded.

After she went out, the President asked if we should remove the President’s picture from the rear wall and put up that of Devgun because he was the only one who had succeeded in even making women to pay for the fun he had.

Aftermath

After months of the BoI, once, by sheer accident, Devgun was caught and they put him in custody in a cell whilst awaiting court-martial. It is customary to put the personnel from the same unit as guards as well as officers to keep a watch and so the cool submariners guarded Devgun in sharp contrast to how he used to guard their interests in the past.

After being in the cell for a day or two, he mentioned to the cool officer on duty that both he and the officer could take a break and paint the town red. His I-Card and wallet were hence given back to him by this cool officer and as promised, Devgun took him to the apartment of a woman of ill repute. She lived on a higher floor in a multi-story building. Devgun handed over his I-Card, wallet and gold-chain etc to the officer waiting down there in his jeep whilst he went to have fun (as John Milton famously said: They also serve who sit in the jeep and wait). After 30 minutes or so Devgun emerged and told the officer that she was waiting for him. So now it was the turn of the officer to give him his I-Card, wallet etc whilst he (the officer) too went to taste the paradise.

That was the last that was seen of Devgun!

Kya Cool Hain Hum?!