People from the South India may not agree and there is a court ruling to the effect that they (the South Indians, that is) are right but most of us regarded Hindi as the national language of India. On the lighter side, after their success in Jallikattu episode, no one locks horns with them.
The reason for our (mistaken) belief was that my tenure in Naval Headquarters coincided with a renewed Hindi drive. Notices had been put in all offices: ‘Is karyalya mein Hindi mein kaam karne ki poori chhoot hai’ (There is full freedom in this office to do official work in Hindi).
The government also decreed that 25 percent of all stenographers in all government offices should be Hindi stenographers. Accordingly, Lata, a Hindi stenographer, landed up in DOT, ie, Directorate of Tactics, Naval Headquarters, A-Block Hutments, Dalhousie Road, New Delhi (Please read: ‘The Also Serve Who Are In Naval Headquarters! – Part III – A-Block Hutments’).
I was the junior most of the officers in DOT and hence Lata was duly assigned to me.
Her name-sake hadn’t yet got the Bharat Ratna but I could have given one to Lata any time. I had always prided myself for knowing more than adequate Hindi. However, I soon realised that between my Hindi and Lata’s there was a huge language barrier. There was a further gap between what she took down in shorthand and what she finally typed.
Now, as all of you may know, Indian Navy was very fortunate that at the time of independence, we received from the NATO some of their tactical publications, for the simple reason that we in the Indian Navy used to carry out joint exercises with their navies. They were all in Queen’s English and many of us had problems understanding the true import of the tactical manoeuvres, screens, signals, et al in English itself. Hence, you can imagine the travails of doing official work at Directorate of Tactics in Hindi.
Lata, therefore, sat at her table with a type-writer in front and did crotchet work in summers and knitting in the winters.
All of you must have read my success story about how I finally managed an office for myself in A Block Hutments. This must have proved to you that I am used to converting challenges into opportunities, something that any number of Quotes these days tell you to do. I was ahead of my times, so as to say!
Being quite junior in Naval Headquarters, there were any number of these महारथी (Titans) in various directorates who would want to have the better of me through file-notings and letters. I started replying to them in shudh Hindi complete with such words as अनुलग्नक and संदर्भ.
Let me paint a scenario to you; an actual one. Lets say, Staff Officer to ACNS (Ops) had sent a note saying update on points discussed in last Commander’s Conference pertaining to DOT had not yet been received; I would send a reply back: इस संधर्भ में इस प्रबंध-विभाग की पत्र संख्या ०१०३/युक्ति दिनांक १० अगस्त १९८८ जो आपको पहले ही सलंग्न की गयी थी, दोबारा से अनुलग्नक है I
The effect would be somewhat similar to the last ball six scored by Bhuvan in the 2001 movie Lagaan. Indeed, I kept scoring one ‘six’ after another.
As mentioned in the previous post (‘The Also Serve Who Are In Naval Headquarters! – Part III – A-Block Hutments’) my next appointment was to the DSSC (Defence Srvices Staff College) to undergo the staff and administration course. Halfway through my course, I received an official letter from NHQ that I had been given an award for doing maximum work in Hindi. A cheque for Rupees 500 was enclosed.
People in Directorate of Tactics are invariably posted there because of their strong tactical acumen! Both Lata and I were rewarded for ours: she with Bharat Ratna given by me and me with a cheque for Rupees 500!
To the best of my knowledge Henry Wadsworth Longfellow never visited A-Block Hutments, Dalhousie Road, New Delhi. For, if he had, he would have surely revised his famous lines:
“Dust thou are and to dust returnest, Was not spoken of the soul.”
Those who served in A-Block Hutments had even their souls drenched in dust.
And to think that we in the Navy wore white uniforms in summers and black serge tunics and pants in the winters. Dust indeed showed more than our name tallies and hence our actual introduction. Monkeys outnumbered us ten to one. Whilst access was strictly controlled for us through rigorous identity checks, these simians entered and exited at will. Sometimes, honestly speaking, we envied the monkeys; they had more freedom of movement, for one thing.
I remember during those days there was a small news-item (I have kept the cuttting somewhere): Delhi administration had written to Himachal Chief Secretary asking him if the latter wanted a few thousand monkeys to be gifted to Himachal, free of cost. HP Chief Secy had responded, “No, thanks; we have enough of our own”.
DOT or Directorate of Tactics in Naval Headquarters occupied the ramshackle building, the first building next to the road named after James Andrew Broun-Ramsay, 1st Marquess of Dalhousie KT PC and known as The Earl of Dalhousie or simply Dalhousie, the erstwhile (early to mid nineteenth century) Governor General of India. Being from Himachal, when my father was posted in Chamba, we used to visit the Hill Station named after Earl of Dalhousie. It is a most picturesque and pleasant hill station. However, Dalhousie Road in New Delhi should make the Earl turn in his grave.
I don’t have a picture of A Block Hutments (No Photography rule). However, this is a picture of CAO of Ministry of Defence responsible for recruitment and provision of civilian manpower for the Service Headquarters of Indian Armed Forces. These offices are at least ten times better than A Block Hutments just across the road. Sena Bhawan is in the background (Pic courtesy: www.caomod.nic.in)
Most of the Tactics that we drafted out there are classified or highly classified. However, this one can be shared:
When I reported there, after the usual chat with my seniors, I asked them as to where my office was. One of them couldn’t control his laughter, whilst the others suddenly remembered that they had urgent file-notings to make. So, I came out and asked the office staff. They followed similar tactics, making me believe that everyone selected to be part of DOT was because of his/her strong ‘tactical acumen’. Finally, a kind hearted Petty Officer M Singh told me, “Sir, jahan aap ko achha lagta hai, wahin office bana leejiye” (Sir, wherever you see a good place, make it your office). I realised that in addition to ‘tactical acumen’, ‘innovation’ was called for.
Within a few days I managed to get a table and chair and ‘installed’ it in the verandah. If you notice the word ‘installed’ in inverted commas, I must explain. In the armed forces, we always use officious sounding lingo. For example, if you are doing the Middle Watch on the Bridge of a ship, and you have this sudden urge to have coffee, you don’t ask the Midshipman of the Watch to go fetch some. You invariably tell him, “Snotty, go and organise some coffee”. That makes him look important. (Now please don’t ask me what ‘Snotty’ means; look up on Google; else, I shall not be able to complete my story).
A visit to the Directorate of Administration (The Navy has now a Flag Officer Administration after the MoD objected to the Navy appointing a Flag Officer Delhi Area (FODA) without their approval) (Please read: ‘They Also Serve Who Are In Naval Headquarters’) got me some plywood with which I could cover the face of the verandah and lo and behold, I had an office! That got rid of the dust.
James Ivory and Ismail Merchant, unlike Longfellow and Dalhousie, surely seem to have visited A-Block Hutments for they named their 1983 movie ‘Heat and Dust’ that starred, amongst others, Shashi Kapoor and tabla-maestro Zakir Hussain. Hence, after getting rid of the ‘dust’ (somewhat), I had to now tackle the ‘heat’.
A hole was made in one of the plywood sheets and a desert-cooler (an appropriate name for where I was) was installed. It felt like paradise; somewhat similar to how the best cuisine in the world doesn’t seem as tasty as the omelette you make yourself.
This entire process took about one year but, you should have seen the transformation in me. Here I was, in Naval Headquarters and within a year of my being in A-Block Hutments, I had an office to myself!
‘Tactical acumen’ and ‘innovation’ helped. I got a name plate made: LtCdr RPS Ravi, ADOT (Coord) and for the next one year I basked in self glory.
When I left for my staff course after that, having won an award there (seriously, no jokes; I will tell you about it shortly; in the next Part), I felt like singing:
तूने तिनका-तिनका चुन कर, नगरी एक बसाई
बारिश में तेरी भीगी काया, धूप में गरमी छाई
ग़म ना कर जो तेरी मेहनत तेरे काम ना आई
अच्छा है कुछ ले जाने से देकर ही कुछ जाना
चल उड़ जा रे पंछी …
If you have read my ‘They Also Serve Who Are In Naval Headquarters’, you would remember how I clarified that even though you are in the Navy, you can’t be at sea all the time. You have to serve ashore too. And whilst ashore, you are either posted at headquarters or have to deal with one.
No one likes to serve in Naval Headquarters, but sometimes you have no choice. You might have been a Commanding Officer of a ship, regarding yourself as God or even a C-in-C, one up than God too, whose fine taste in everything was admired by the entire command, in Naval Headquarters you are just a staff officer pushing and receiving something called files.
My first and only brush (thank God for that) with Naval Headquarters was in the rank of a Lt.Commander. In a down-to-earth (literally) manner, I was posted in the newly formed Directorate of Tactics: DOT (Mohan Ram Sir, an eminent writer on my Facebook group called ‘Humour In And Out Of Uniform’ would have, with enough justification, christened it as Directorate of Triviality; since that’s what Tactics sound to many but fortunately it wasn’t formed during his time). Down-to-earth was because the directorate was situated in what was called A-Block Hutments and ‘earth’ was all around and over you in its avatar called ‘dust’.
Commodore Ravi Sikka landed up as our director. Having been in command of an indigenously designed and constructed frigate Nilgiri, prior to his appointment at NHQ, it was quite a come down to be at A-Block Hutments. He was the last word in Tactics and was the original author of INFIs (Indian Naval Fighting Instructions). He was with computers, mathematical calculations, algorithms and probabilities even before most people had heard of them.
Noritake crockery that a CO is used to on his ship
However, what he was not prepared for was the way of doing things at Naval Headquarters in general and A-Block Hutments in particular. During the first meeting that he had with all of us in his office, he asked me (the junior most) to arrange for some tea. I went out, gave instructions to Gullu (the tea-boy) and came back. Now on his ship, Cmde Ravi Sikka must have been used to tea being served by the steward wearing spotless white gloves and in the finest porcelain. So, when Gullu entered with cups (without saucers) of all hues and shapes, threaded with his fingers through their handles; tea in an empty Hercules XXX rum bottle, and paper cuttings to keep the ‘besan’ on, Sikka Sir demurred and said we could have the ‘damned’ tea if we desired but he would not stoop so low. We dutifully had our tea and besan (sweet made from gram-flour, sugar and oil). The meeting finally got over and we left.
Some of the (better) cups of Gullu
Commodore Sikka’s transformation into a NHQ seasoned officer took place, just like the initiation process for all of us, gradually as follows:
Day#4: “I finally had that ‘damned’ tea. It isn’t all that bad, you know” (we smiled at the ‘discovery’ of the new convert).
Day #7: “I say that ‘besan‘ is quite tasty. Looks like they make it well”.
Day #10: “Tea and ‘besan‘! What a combination! Puts life in you”.
Day #14: “Went for this meeting with DCNS in the morning. As soon as the meeting got over, I rushed back so that I won’t miss my tea and ‘besan‘”.
Naval Headquarters culture claimed another victim!
Officers may come and officers may go but Gullu goes on forever!
If you are amused at the title of this post being similar to the 17th century poet John Milton’s famous last line in the sonnet ‘When I Consider How My Light is Spent’, the similarity, I hasten to add, is intentional. As we go along, you will understand.
The business end of the navy is at sea and that is where you want to be; that’s where there is life, order, sanity and some justification for being what you are: a sea-warrior. However much you dislike, you can’t be at sea all the time and have to serve ashore some time or the other. And whilst ashore, you have to either serve at headquarters or deal with one. That’s the time you learn, if you are doing it for the first time, how different navy life can be; you acquire a totally different perspective and environment (Earlier, I have written two articles on the subject: ‘The Tail Wags The Dog And How!’ and ‘The Tail Wags The Dog And How! – Part II’)
Ten days ago, the Navy was in the news for having appointed a Flag Officer Delhi Area (FODA) without the consent of the Ministry of Defence (MoD). MoD, unlike what people think, is actually a fighting or combat organisation. It is at all times at war with the armed forces. Here, however, it patted itself on the back (something that it has mastered over years) for having caught the Navy on the wrong foot. The Navy justified the appointment, but, insisted that FODA is now to be called Flag Officer Administration:
“We required such an office as we are very soon going to start work on the construction of Nau Sena Bhawan which will be a big task and otherwise also, the workload had gone up quite considerably in the national capital,” senior Navy sources explained. (The pic on top is of the foundation stone laying ceremony on 20 Aug 14).
The tail is now considerably larger and the poor dog at sea (sea-dog) is ready to be wagged violently and continuously.
In the Naval Headquarters at New Delhi the phrase Navy is not a vocation but a way of life is not entirely reflective of the true picture; for most it is a nine-to-five office job. The gap between theory and practice there is even greater than between the peninsular India and the land-locked capital. One of my course-mates, for example, landed up at NHQ immediately after undergoing the Staff Course at DSSC, Wellington (Nilgiris). In the staff course, he was converted into a Sahib with such theoretical things as Whitehall system of filing and other norms of handling correspondence. At the end of his first day, as he approached me in my ramshackle office (I had joined about a year before him and hence knew my way around there), he had tears in his eyes. Let alone not being able to locate a single file as per the Whitehall system, he was unable to find a chair or table for himself.
They also serve who are in Naval Headquarters!
I remember how amused I myself was when I attended my first meeting at NHQ on the all important topic of ‘The use of Hemp ropes on board ships’. The meeting was to start at 2:30 PM immediately after lunch. By about 3 PM everyone had trickled in except Commander A Singh. The chairman of the meeting, a senior Commodore, waited for everyone without once losing his temper. On the ships, he would have taken everyone’s pants off for keeping him waiting even for five minutes. Now, here, he was just drumming his table and asking, “Should we wait for A Singh or start the meeting?” and the senior officers around him kept saying, “Lets wait for A Singh”. By 3:15 PM, the Commodore’s limit of patience had been reached and he said, “Lets not wait for A Singh anymore. Lets start the meeting. He can join in when he comes.” Everyone acquiesced with this decision. The Commodore began the meeting by welcoming everyone and then he asked for someone to read out the minutes of the last meeting. Everyone said that there was a problem here since the minutes had not been circulated by A Singh (In NHQ, I quickly learnt that the absent member is to be blamed for everything. After leaving the Navy, when I joined the corporate sector, once I attended a meeting in the North Block (the business end of the government; the MoD and the armed forces headquarters are in the South Block) on the issue of ‘Security of SBMs’ (Single Buoy Moorings; whereat great percentage of crude oil is received from VLCCs or Very Large Crude Carriers). The chairman kept saying that this security had been handed over to XYZ. No one had any objection to it. I was quick to notice that the XYZ representatives weren’t attending the meeting. When I pointed this out, it was explained to me that it was deliberate since if the XYZ reps were to attend the meeting, they would have serious objections to it; now, they would learn of the decision through the minutes of the meeting. Naturally, in Naval Headquarters, we quickly learn the ways of our civilian counterparts rather than making them learn our disciplined and orderly ways). After an hour of the meeting on the subject of ‘Use of hemp ropes on ships’ the meeting was called off since A Singh, the most important member of the meeting hadn’t arrived.
They also serve who are in Naval Headquarters!
If you are wondering what I alluded to by the ways of the civilians in the last paragraph, I would like to point out that these are not just to be seen at the top levels. At the ground level (almost all the secretarial staff in the directorates is civilians), it is to be seen to be believed. My office clerk, for example, vanished for 114 days without informing me and I had to do most of my typing myself. When I pointed this to the DOA (Directorate of Administration) guys, they said due to manpower shortages, no relief could be provided. How about taking action against the clerk? They said this would be possible when the clerk would report back on duty. There is never any urgency for anything at the headquarters; things get sorted out on their own.
What about the gallant sailors who do wonders on the ships, who produce results against all odds? Well, in Naval Headquarters, these are mostly from North Indian states who are on home or closer-to-home postings. They are, therefore, least likely to complain about anything even if asked to fetch canteen items or movie tickets.
If I have painted a somewhat dismal environment of Naval Headquarters, I hasten to correct the view that great and difficult things actually happen at the headquarters. Whilst the Navy at sea is only preparing or training to fight against the enemy, in Naval Headquarters, the guys are actually fighting to obtain things for the Navy from the Ministry or ministries. How important this exercise is can be made out from the awards and honours list: a large percentage of those serving in Naval Headquarters find their names in the list.
They also serve who are in Naval Headquarters!
A few years back, when I was still in the Navy, the citation of a Commodore for Nausena Medal (Devotion to Duty) actually read that: “He obtained sanction for ‘ABC’ from the ministry against all odds, thereby accomplishing something beyond the ordinary call of duty.”
The Navy is a combat service, indeed; the MoD ensures we stay that way.
If the title suggests to you that we went around with our Kodak or Agfa cameras (the prevalent models in the 1970s) to take pictures of our favourite film-stars like Dilip Kumar, Dev Anand, Vyjayanthimala or Nutan, you are as far away from the mark as someone who thinks pineapple is an apple-like fruit that grows on the pine trees. Worse, if you think, we – the navy officers – had decided to get rid of the bad guys or the villains in the Indian movies from Jeevan to Pran to Amjad Khan in Sholay and carried guns for that specific purpose, once again, you are wrong.
Shooting Stars is simply the process of bringing down to the horizon the images with the help of a marine sextant (see picture) of some of the 57 navigational stars given in the nautical almanac at the times of morning and evening nautical twilights (when both the stars and the horizon can be seen by the naked eye), thus measuring their exact angle with the earth’s horizon in degrees, arcminutes and arcseconds. The idea was to fix the position of a ship at sea, far from shore objects, in comparison to the known position of some of these 57 navigational stars. Naturally, in order to fix the position of the ship with some accuracy, one would have to get more than two bearing lines. The accuracy and the fastness of the observations would ensure that most of the bearing lines (from more than two stars) would meet at a point and that would be the fixed position of the ship. Without boring you with complex details, this in essence is the theory of the celestial navigation, also known as astronavigation. During our formative years in the navy, all of us had to learn the intricacies of the astronavigation.
Shooting the sun (Pic courtesy: wpclipart.com)
What about daytime? you will ask me. Well, one would shoot the sun! Aha, but sun is only one, you will persist. Yes, thank God, it is only one. However, if you measure the angle of the sun at different times of the day, allow for the changes in dead-reckoning (or DR) positions of the ship, you will get as many bearing lines as the number of times you shoot the sun, and then, once again, you can fix the ship. Fair enough, you will now ask, but, what exactly is a dead reckoning (DR) position. If you ain’t seeing the stars until now, a DR position is:
DR Position (Pic courtesy: sailtrain.co.uk)
the process of calculating one’s current position by using a previously determined position, or fix, and advancing that position based upon known or estimated speeds over elapsed time and course. The corresponding term in biology, used to describe the processes by which animals update their estimates of position or heading, is path integration.
I remember the time, when I underwent my higher-command course with the army at Mhow, and we joked about army in the mountains advancing with the speed of the mules (they provide logistic support to the army and no army can reach a place or sustain itself unless and until the mules carrying the logistics have cought up). We used to have any number of cartoons about the pongos (naval slang for army infantry guys) and mules. Little did the army guys know that some of our own methods also originated from the animals!
If you are with me so far, with or without stars in your eyes, you would then ask me if we already have the DR position, why to then further fix the ship? Well, DR positions are nowhere near being accurate. As with the animals, you would have to track all the various paths and speeds that the animal took and then arrive at his/her final position after a few hours. First of all it would depend upon the accuracy of the initial position and then on the accuracy of measurement of all the courses and speeds and drifts due to currents and winds and then arrive at the final position.
For example, lets say, the three or more plotted lines if they don’t meet at one point, they would form between them a figure called cocked-hat. Most often than not, all of us busying ourselves in astronavigation would land up with more cocked-hats than in the complete wardrobe of, say, Nelson.
Hence, astronavigation was for us the process of finding the ship’s position more accurately than the dead-reckoning (DR) position. A final question that you would ask me is that weren’t there modern technological means available to fix the ship? Well, there were, but, we were to learn astronavigation just-in-case in the same manner as we kept learning sails and masts even after the advent of steam-ships.
Finally, I might as well tell you that being at sea is very much different from anything that you can imagine. You have no idea of how lost you can get after spending a few hours or days at sea. All directions appear the same and there is nothing to differentiate one from the other. The only analogy that I can give you is the one given by my armoured course mates (how the poor guys miss out on becoming the army chiefs unless it is by accident!) in desert warfare; at times you have no idea of whether you are coming or going. Anyway, let me add that this confusion of being at sea has led Fleet Navigating Officers (the most qualified navigators in the fleet) of leading an entire fleet into waters and even harbours different from the ones that they had intended (as an example, please read: ‘Poor Communicator Had The Last Laugh’). In a major tactical exercise at sea, as another example, when the fleet at sea was divided into Red (enemy) and Blue (own) forces, two ships of the Blue forces encountered each other after going on different tracks and shot missiles at each other thinking of the other as Red ship.
A navy officer, of my era or earlier, would therefore be well versed with recognising navigational stars at sea and would rattle out star names such as Sirius, Rigel, Betelgeuse, Pollux, Aldebaran, Capella, Spica, Arcturus and the Belt of Orion simply by looking at the sky.
Other than that, let me assure you, there is a vast difference between the theory and the practice. For those of you who think it is ancient and outdated, let me tell you that the most modern navy in the world – the US Navy – discontinued (in part only) celestial navigation being taught to its officers in formative years only. And what is the part that they discontinued? Well, the part of physically calculating and drawing bearing lines ( a 22 step process that we all learnt). Instead, nowadays, the shooting star data (the physical data) is fed into a computer and a fix is obtained almost instantly. There are clearly advantages in astronavigation such as its signals cannot be jammed or stopped (unlike that of a radar or even satellite), it is globally available (stars and sun are available everywhere) and the process doesn’t give out any signals that can be detected by the enemy.
However, the inaccuracies of the process (two people are required at the same time to shoot stars: one for bringing the star to the horizon and the other for accurately noting the time of the observation with a chronometer) are many such as inaccurately calibrated sextant or chronometer, great inaccuracies in the last known position, misidentified stars, horizon not being clear due to many reasons (such as choppy seas) and inaccuracies in calculating and plotting. And these led to some hilarious situations at sea.
One that we had often heard was about these young Royal Navy officers trying out celestial navigation in the Thames river in the olden days. After the position calculated by them was plotted on the chart, the Navigator told them gravely that they would have to remove their hats as the ship had landed up in the middle of Saint Paul’s Cathedral.
In our case too, many a times the fix was plotted on the land. Minutes and even hours of shooting stars or the sun, calculating and plotting, would be of no use to the ship.
During my higher command course with the army, the only use for the navy that my army course mates found was to help them in their operations on land. Little did they know how often we had been helping them during the course of astronavigation by landing our ships just next to where they were busy fighting land battles!
क्या अजब है मेरे देश में ये पैसे का खेल?
अमीर की बद-अमली ग़रीब रहा है झेल I
आज़ादी के वक़्त से वह खड़ा है कतार में,
कोई तो होगा कभी किसी भी सरकार में,
जो उसके दिन भी वैसे ही बदल डाले,
जैसे नेताओं के बदलते हैं एक ही चुनाव में I
क्या अजब है मेरे देश में ये पैसे का खेल?
बद उनवान को नहीं, ईमानदार को मिली है जेल I
यह वोटों और नोटों वाले आम आदमी को पूजते हैं,
पर अकेले में तो यह भगवान् को भी लूटते हैं,
कहो इनसे कभी यह भी ख़ुदा के ही बन्दे हैं,
इनके महल बनाने में जिनके हाथ पैर सूजते हैं I
क्या अजब है मेरे देश में ये पैसे का खेल?
इनसानियत ओ इख्लाकियत की जैसे लगी हुई है ‘सेल’ I
“ग़रीबी हटाओ” “जम्होरीअत बचाओ” के नारे बहुत सुन लिए,
जागते सोते इन्साफ-ओ-खुशहाली के ख्वाब बहुत बुन लिए,
अब इंक़लाब आने का माहौल बना जाता है,
इन्तेख़ाब आते गए और हर दफा खुदगर्ज़ ही चुन लिए I
क्या अजब है मेरे देश में ये पैसे का खेल?
अमीर की बद-अमली ग़रीब रहा है झेल I
(Pic courtesy: news18.com)
Kya ajab hai mere desh mein ye paise ka khel?
Ameer ki bad-amli gareeb raha hai jhel.
Azaadi ke waqt se woh khada hai qataar main,
Koi to hoga kabhi kisi bhi sarkaar mein,
Jo uske din bhi waise hi badal daale,
Jaise netaayon ke badlate hain ek hi chunaav mein,
Kya ajab hai mere desh mein ye paise ka khel?
Bad unwaan ko nahin, imaandaar ko mili hai jail.
Yeh voton aur noton waale aam aadmi ko poojte hain,
Par akele mein to yeh bhagwaan ko bhi lootte hain,
Kaho inse kabhi yeh bhi khuda ke hi bande hain,
Inke mahal banane mein jinke haath pair soojte hain.
Kyaa ajab hai mere desh mein ye paise ka khel?
Insaaniyat o ikhlaqiyat ki jaise lagi hui hai ‘sale’.
“Gareebi hataao” “Jamhoriyat bachaao” ke naare bahut sun liye,
jaagte sote insaaf-o-khushaali ke khwaab bahut bun liye;
Ab inqlaab aane ka mahaul bana jaata hai,
Intekhaab aate gaye aur har dafaa khudgarz hi chun liye.
Kyaa ajab hai mere desh mein ye paise ka khel?
Ameer ki bad-amli gareeb raha hai jhel.
Submariners are a class apart. They are cooler than the arctic ice that you saw in the movie Ice Station Zebra in which Rock Hudson played Commander James Ferraday, Captain of the US attack submarine USS Tigerfish. Some of you who saw the movie would recall that the movie was ostensibly about rescuing British personnel on a drifting ice weather station in the arctic but actually about a classified intelligence mission. There was this scene in the movie when Commander Ferraday welcomes ‘Mr. Jones‘, the British intelligence agent on board by telling him, “Here on this boat, we are very informal. Everyone is known by his first name. My first name is ‘Captain’.” How cool that sounded. Well, submariners are like that.
Before they join the branch, there is a special psychology and psychiatrist test for them to qualify; for, if they ain’t the cool type, amongst other attributes, they can commit fatal mistakes in the closed confines of a submarine (In the F class of submarines, for example, the sailor on watch in the DG compartment didn’t have space enough to stand erect). Our famous tall submariner is Admiral VS Shekhawat. His bunk was extended by more than a foot on the submarine so that he could at least sleep properly. He was my CO on a ship and he was cooler than any cucumber.
Anyway, I hope you got the point about the submariners being the coolest of the cats.
What do all of us in the Navy do when we are not at sea? You would expect us to be enjoying life (“Coolex” as the navy men say it; the suffix ‘ex’ is used for exercises. Hence, TACEX would be a tactical exercise. In the same manner, ‘Coolex‘ would mean an exercise in cooling one’s heels!) or twiddling our thumbs. Far from it. Half of us are busy writing reports of the exercises done at sea (most of us return ashore bleary-eyed since the naval authorities are convinced that the time at sea is very costly for the nation and every minute must be made use of). The other half is given to such tasks as the ones ashore should have been doing but being overworked, they have to reluctantly pass it on to the people on the ships after they have enjoyed themselves doing nothing at sea.
One of the tasks given to me when I was commanding my boat Vipul was to conduct a Board of Inquiry into circumstances leading to an Assistant Logistic Officer (ALO) by the name of Lieutenant Devgun having walked away with Rupees 33 Lakhs from the accounts of the Submarine Base in Mumbai (COMCOS (West)). I was one of the members (a BoI normally has three members including the President). Our President was then Captain (later Rear Admiral) Kochhar, CO of the carrier Vikrant. And then we had a Logistic Officer, Commander Anand, who had all rules and regulations concerning accounts at the back of his hand.
To complete the background, I must mention that the rear wall of any BoI and Court Martial room has to have a picture of the President of India in his capacity as the Supreme Commander of the armed forces.
As we commenced the BoI, we realised that the cool submariners had left everything to the super cool Devgun. The Logistic Officer, Devgun’s immediate boss, for example, had become an expert at solving crosswords since he totally trusted his assistant Devgun to handle accounts, cash, money warrant, ledgers, and locking unlocking of the money safe held in his personal custody. All the others in the Base were equally cool about trusting Devgun with even surprise muster of accounts. He not just maintained Imprest Account but others, busy as they were, coolly disposed off even the handling of their Non-Public Fund accounts to him. The more we went into their coolness, the more we realised that anything and everything had been left to the man with a gun and the Hindi name for god in his name.
Indeed, the President of the BoI mentioned during one of the tea-breaks conjectured as to why couldn’t they have madee him the COMCOS (Commodore Commanding Submarines) since Devgun virtually did everything as a Lieutenant; and, he had risen to this rank from being a sailor?
More and more skeletons came out of the submariners’ cupboards as we took up one thread or the other. As an example, lets say there was a party at the Submarine Base. Who do you think did the local purchase of things required for the party? Well, you have easily guessed it; the cool submariners’ most trusted officer Devgun did it and made underhand money there too (as if 33 Lakh rupees (a huge sum during those days) wasn’t enough). Finally, we decided that we would have to restrict the scope of the BoI since it was otherwise becoming gargantuan with no end in sight. We informed the command headquarters accordingly.
One day, one of the witnesses (a woman) brought out that Devgun was also running a Chit Fund with the promise of making everyone rich. Whilst her evidence was being recorded, we had a tea-break. During the tea-break, the President enquired from the lady stenographer given to us to record the proceedings (in shorthand) (she was a steno at the submarine base itself) about this Chit Fund. She mentioned that many women employees of the Base had given him money for the Chit Fund so as to become rich. She also shyly suggested that many had even illicit relations with him.
On an impulse, the President BoI asked her if she too had lent money to him for the Chit Fund. She lowered her eyes and nodded.
After she went out, the President asked if we should remove the President’s picture from the rear wall and put up that of Devgun because he was the only one who had succeeded in even making women to pay for the fun he had.
Aftermath
After months of the BoI, once, by sheer accident, Devgun was caught and they put him in custody in a cell whilst awaiting court-martial. It is customary to put the personnel from the same unit as guards as well as officers to keep a watch and so the cool submariners guarded Devgun in sharp contrast to how he used to guard their interests in the past.
After being in the cell for a day or two, he mentioned to the cool officer on duty that both he and the officer could take a break and paint the town red. His I-Card and wallet were hence given back to him by this cool officer and as promised, Devgun took him to the apartment of a woman of ill repute. She lived on a higher floor in a multi-story building. Devgun handed over his I-Card, wallet and gold-chain etc to the officer waiting down there in his jeep whilst he went to have fun (as John Milton famously said: They also serve who sit in the jeep and wait). After 30 minutes or so Devgun emerged and told the officer that she was waiting for him. So now it was the turn of the officer to give him his I-Card, wallet etc whilst he (the officer) too went to taste the paradise.
Some of your friends who don’t exactly say it but mean it nevertheless remind you of people who are quite at home with stray dogs but cannot stand your pet-dogs. Why this strange-sounding simile? Well, on social-media discussions, the same people, would quote from little known, pedestrian authors and indeed from recirculated internet stuff that goes by the misnomer of ‘knowledge’, but readily ignore your well researched essay. There must be some psychology, some reasons behind this secret hatred for blogs. Let me examine some of these.
1.Mujhe Bhi Kuchh Kehna Hai (I too have something to say). In an essay titled ‘All Photographers And Writers, No Viewers And Readers’, I brought out that the biggest two techno-social changes that have affected our lives in the last decade or so are that everyone is a photographer and everyone can write and instantly publish. Hence, there is nothing unique or extraordinary about anyone who writes or clicks pictures. Lets take the latter first; if someone puts up pictures of his family trip to London, you can put up pictures of your trip to Rio. “London is really a destination where people used to go in the last century; it is time that these commoners now learn to go to more exotic locales. But, frankly, they don’t have it in them; for them, London is still abroad“. Now, let’s get to writing blogs: “What’s so special about what he has written? I don’t have time, else, I could have written ten such articles and with better English and humour”. If you ever visit largest Indian Blogging site Indiblogger, you will discover that they maintain a ranking of blogs dependant upon people voting for blog posts. And who are the people who vote? Well, other bloggers. Everyone, therefore, follows the tenet: ‘You scratch my back, I scratch yours‘.
2. Ghar Ki Murgi Dal Barabar (Home-grown chicken is worth (lowly) dal (cereal) only).Ah, the time when we used to read the brilliant stuff of really intelligent men and women in newspapers and magazines. Somehow the stuff that the boy or the girl next door writes does not sound that erudite or good. It is almost like discovering your son paints as good as Picasso or Rembrandt! How can that be? Yes, we want social media revolution to change governance in the country, our surroundings, world politics and community religion. However, our next door blogger doesn’t have the calibre to take on anything even close to it. In any case, having heard and read him a few times, we already have good knowledge of what he/she is going to say.
3. Quantity Has Made Quality Suffer. You can gather all kinds of arguments to support your theory. One of them is that delightful cuisine cannot be made for millions. Yes, blue jeans was an invention that changed the way masses dressed and really well to do people spent their lifetime. thereafter, in Levis. However, you cannot go to a gourmet dinner dressed in blue jeans, can you? Naturally, as seen by you since you make all the arguments to suit your bias, quality has certainly suffered now that everyone who has Internet can publish. In the words of the Urdu poet:
Barbad gulistaan karne ko to ek hi ullu kaafi tha, Yahan..har shaakh pe ullu baitha hai anjam-e-gulistan kya hoga?
(For destroying the wonderful garden, even one owl is sufficient,
Here there is an owl on each branch, wonder what would happen to the garden?)
4. I Know The Author Well; He/She Can’t Write For Nuts. Whilst with the author in a novel, newspaper or periodical there was no personal linkages, more often than not, with a blogger, you are one to one. Hence, your mind works overtime to remember how he was a nincompoop when you were with him in school or college or elsewhere. He couldn’t make a sentence in English properly. Then there is another bigger problem, which is, that one reads so that one can quote in good company. People are taken aback when you suddenly quote a verse of Coleridge or some other quote of say, Tolstoy. But, imagine trying to impress a company by saying that your friend, the blogger wrote it. Naturally, you can’t even impress people by quoting him/her. Perhaps, if it makes a lot of sense, you can say Vikram Seth said it! In any case, who would have read all that Seth wrote?
5. Who Has The Time?The race for time is similar to Mumbai traffic or for that matter traffic in any other Indian city. Once, when a motorist overtook me in very slow moving traffic, by hook or crook, and I came parallel to him at the next traffic lights, I lowered my window and asked him, “भाई साहिब, मान लो आप मुझसे दो तीन मिनट पहले अपने ठिकाने पर पहुँच जाओगे; पर उस दो तीन मिनट में आप करने क्या वाले हैं?” (Brother, supposing that you reach your destination two or three minutes ahead of me; but, what exactly are you going to do in those two or three minutes). He laughed and laughed and said, “क्या करें? आदत पढ़ गयी है?” (What to do? It has become a habit). The same people who complain about lack of time spend hours solving the Sudoku.
6. He Is Only Promoting His Blog. In a way, unless you believe in literary masturbation, you write so that people would read. You don’t make any money writing your blog; however, they make it look like as if blogs are similar to prostitution in which you woo your clients by selling your body and soul. Recently, I had this experience when a friend used these exact words to win an argument that he was otherwise trying to win through profanity.
(Cartoon courtesy: paintermommy.com)
7. I Can’t Be Forced Into Reading Anything; I Choose To Read What I Want To. For heavens sake, our choices over a period of time are dwindling. With the onslaught of advertisements, we don’t ever have a choice of what we buy and use; we don’t have a choice in government making even though we vote election after election: many of us don’t have a choice of partner for life,and so on. At least, let me exercise choice in reading what I want to read rather than being forced to read something sent by a friend.
8. Why Can’t He Write ‘Short-and-Sweet’? Most highly popular blogs have just a picture or two or a quote or a paragraph of recirculated stuff. People immediately identify with such stuff. Such stuff also meets the demands of some of the reasons that I have given above, especially lack of time. A few years ago I started a number of groups on Facebook on various themes ranging from ‘Laugh With The Punjabis‘ and ‘Humour In And Out Of Uniform‘ to ‘Yaad Kiya Dil Ne‘ (a group for sharing music) and ‘Main Shayar To Nahin‘ (a group for sharing poetry). I insisted that people would write as per the theme of the group, write original, and steer clear of posting greetings, religious messages, political messages, and other such nonsense. I wrote my experiences in an essay titled: ‘Want To Start A Facebook Group? Have A Reality Check‘. Soon, all groups on Facebook become Friends Circles wherein everything and anything is posted. No one reads serious poetry either written by friends or by recognised poets, for example. People are happy to write, like and comment on such gibberish as:
जब तुम्हारी याद आती है तो बहुत दर्द होता है,
जब दर्द होता है तो तुम्हारी याद आती हैI
This is short and sweet. I accessed this site and found this s & s piece had 453 likes and 117 comments.
There you are: I have tried to find reasons as to why blogs are hated and disliked. If you are a blogger and you have some other reasons to add, please go ahead and share in the comments.
It is surprising that those who start on a common platform with a common vocabulary, culture and manners (say NDA or National Defence Academy at Khadakvasla, near Pune in Maharashtra) soon get absorbed in their service ethos as soon as they join their individual services: Army, Navy and the Air Force.
The expression or phrase: Good Lady or Lady Wife is typically Indian Army officers’ (males) way of addressing their wives. Now of course I am used to it but there was a time when I first heard it and decided that it was the equivalent of the expression “I have a bad headache” since even that expression suggests that there must be some people who have good headache too. Likewise, I am yet to meet a person who introduces his wife as a Bad Woman or Coarse Wife. One would, therefore, conclude that Good Lady or Lady Wife is an overkill as much as the overkill in the expression: bad headache. When you say you have a headache (without suffixing it with good or bad), I am sure people don’t automatically assume that you are having a rollicking time and that a headache is something worth having. Coming from the army wherein they have a penchant for abbreviating even short words like Night into Ni and Enemy into En (Please read: Bikini Speech, a piece I wrote when I was undergoing my Higher Command Course with the army)), it is certainly an exaggeration.
In the Navy, a ship is normally referred to as She. Here is a ready-made explanation from Glossophilia:
“A ship is called a she because there is always a great deal of bustle around her; there is usually a gang of men about; she has a waist and stays; it takes a lot of paint to keep her good-looking; it is not the initial expense that breaks you, it is the upkeep; she can be all decked out; it takes an experienced man to handle her correctly; and without a man at the helm, she is absolutely uncontrollable. She shows her topsides, hides her bottom and, when coming into port, always heads for the buoys.”
Of course, that is the explanation that is often to be found in the folk-lore with the navies around the world and no one cares to remember that the Latin and the Sanskrit words for ship are similar: Navis and Naav and that both these are feminine. Nautical slang is not just folk-lore; we use it extensively on board as much as authors like Joseph Conrad did. Hence, a Lady’s Hole was a dainty niche in the stern of the ship wherein a light used to be kept for ships astern of her to steer by. Many others referred to Lady’s Hole as the place wherein a gun ammunition used to be kept.
However, be as it may, in the Navy, a ship is a lady and it requires Good Men to keep her looking comely and fighting-fit. We have so much respect for the ladies that we salute with palm inwards so as not to show our dirty palms to them as a result of keeping the lady clean and proper (the custom having originated in the Royal Navy when, during the Queen’s visit aboard a ship, a deck-hand engaged in manning the tarred lines of the ship, saluted her with his dirty palm facing away from the Queen, as a token of respect).
What about the ceremony of launching a ship by a lady breaking a bottle of wine on the bows of the ship? This practice originated from the religious ceremony of baptism of infants and by late 18th century, this custom of breaking a bottle of wine on the ships bows as she was launched became a standard practice.
A Princess of the House of Hanover, then the ruling House of England, was asked to sponsor one of the ships of the Navy. This became the equivalent of the Royal Army’s tradition of patronage for their regiments. Unfortunately, the Princess threw the bottle with more energy than accuracy and it struck one of the spectators, causing severe injuries to him who subsequently claimed damages from the Admiralty. To avoid a repetition, the Admiralty instituted the protocol of attaching a cord to the bottle.
We, in the Indian Navy, did away with the bottle of wine and introduced the tradition of breaking a coconut on the bows by a lady to launch a ship.
INS Sudarshini, the second of Sail Training Ships (first being INS Tarangini) being launched by Smt Letha Sushil wife of Vice Admiral K N Sushil, Flag Officer Commanding-in-Chief Southern Naval Command at Goa Shipyard
Thus, in naval traditions, ladies are associated with the ships from their launch onwards. When a lady joins the naval family as a wife, a coffee-table book is presented to her with the title: Welcome Young Lady. In the opening paragraph of the book, she is reminded of the fact that for a navy man, his ship (a she at that) happens to be his first love and the Young Lady ought to keep that in mind. Indeed, many of the naval wives, jokingly complain that their husbands spend more time with the lady (she) at sea than the lady at home.
Even at that no naval lady is prepared for the gaffe that was unwittingly cracked by one of the officers (not well versed in the nuances of the English language) thanking his host thus: I thank you from the bottom of my heart (at this stage he suddenly remembered his wife beside him and added) and from my wife’s bottom too.
Another one, stepping off the brow (gangplank) on to the ship, on an evening, introduced the Officer of the Day to his wife and vice-versa by just pointing to the two in turns and saying: “The OOD, the wife”.
It used to be a male world for months and years at sea, away from the land where the ladies and women abound. Irrespective of the saying that a sailor has a girl or a woman in every port, the poor guy was by himself and with his male counterparts at sea. Hence, calling a ship a “she” was not just endearing but also signified the dependent relationship that he had with the ship that sustained him in many different ways. It was thus a common practice of crafting female figureheads for a ship’s prow, for example, in the picture below:
(Pic courtesy: Pinterest)
Hence, whilst the army man proudly shows off his Good Lady or Lady Wife, a navy man is most likely to sing with Mohammad Rafi, a song praising the beauty of a woman, the lyrics for which were written by poet laureate Harindranath Chattopadhyay (brother of Sarojini Naidu). The laughter and spoken lines in the opening and closing sections of the song were performed by Harindranath Chattopadhyay. The song was released in 1969 as a parody to another of Shankar Jaikishan’s compositions for the 1965 movie Gumnaam (four years before this song was released): Hum kaale hain to kya hua dilwaale hain. You will enjoy the lyrics given in the following video except for the fact that the navy man would be singing it for his ship!
If I were to call my wife Good Lady or Lady Wife, she would make me see the stars that I won’t otherwise be seeing at sea.
Sujata or Savitri, Sharda or Sumitra, Jyoti, Ganga or Jamuna, a navy man thinks of best names for his first lady-love: his ship.
What a long-lasting affair?
What a long wait for her?
She has been chasing me
Ever since I was a boy
Perhaps she liked my daring even then
Dangling from rocks
Diving into a raging river naked
To flirt with her
Even when I didn’t know swimming.
During my youth
She knew she had got me
On many an occasion
When I was careless, reckless
But, only nearly
I flirted, she came closer
I never wanted to capitulate totally
But, now that I am confessing
I might as well tell all.
The fact is, being a woman
She too flirted with me
Knowing I was going to marry
Another woman; she didn’t care
On that night, when next morning
My wife was going to join me
I was drunk and I drove my bike
And she sat as pillion
Clutching and feeling me everywhere.
As some sense came into me
And more because I was married
I started keeping distance
Barely acknowledging her presence
Even when I could see her from a distance
And anyone could have seen me
In her bewitching eyes
Waiting to get me
Waiting to hold me in her arms.
I became more careful
More artful about hiding our affair
She was forever in my heart
In my conscious mind
When I retired, she again came closer
I will get you, she whispered publicly
She was as young as when
I was a little boy
And I was the one who had become old.
How long can I resist her?
Her love has grown, but, mine
Mine has nearly died
I don’t flirt with her anymore
I want to run away from her
To a quiet, secluded place
Where she can’t find me
I admire her patience, though
A lifelong wait to have me.
A number of times she’s beckoned me
I too am adamant not to give in
She has everything ready
The flowers, the music, the feast
But can’t she sense, though she’s young
She is not even half as adorable
As when I flirted with her in my youth?
Can’t she sense I don’t
Want to be hers anymore?
Doesn’t she know
I don’t want her anymore?
I love my wife, my kids
My family, my friends
And she doesn’t even fit in
All daring has left me now
I even cross the road
When the walk light is green
I don’t want her anymore.
Shouldn’t she too abandon
The plans to wed me?
Knowing I have become a good guy
Brushing my teeth, twice a day
Taking my pills regularly
Shunning all excitement and evil stuff
For the good of my heart.
Look for someone else, my love
I actually want to live.
Now that I have joined the Veterans’ community six years ago (We wear a badge to that effect in all our gatherings; we in the armed forces have always taken badges so seriously that many of us gave up our lives to earn two inches of ribbon and a badge (medal)), I find that not only that ailments are a constant companion with most of us, talking about our ailments is an irresistible hobby.
Here is how two Veterans meet:
Veteran 1 (heartily): Nice to see you, buddy (it is almost an exclamation at finding him still alive). Veteran 2 (equally heartily): Nice to see you too, ole chap (“I am also stunned that you can still be seen”). Veteran 1 (coming straight to the important issue): So how is your gall-bladder these days? (This in the tone of one inquiring about a close family member). Veteran 2 (wistfully, as if missing the loss): I had it removed. How is your Psoriasis? Veteran 1 (as if talking about a pet dog): Behaving. I have to keep visiting Asvini. But, it is great fun meeting all the old friends there.
Veterans are at, what the author James Michener used to call as, the age of metal; that is, silver in their hair, gold in their teeth, and lead in their walk (though James used a more disparaging term).
Hence, whatever be the original topic of discussion between them, it is dexterously steered to the most significant issue of ailments and solutions. I am reporting an actual conversation (the names ain’t actual):
VeteranA: I heard the good news about your daughter Nalini getting married last month. Veteran B: Yeah, she and Vikas are quite happily settled in the USA. Veteran A: USA is the place to be. What does Vikas do? Veteran B: He is a doctor. Veteran A: A doctor, is it? Somehow the best of our doctors have all gone abroad. The other day I went to Asvini to see a urologist; this b—-r didn’t know his ass from his elbow and I had gone all the way from Kandivli to see him. Veteran B: You are telling me? I had gone to get medicines for my cardiac condition and this chap was simply clueless. On top of that, at the ECHS clinic they didn’t have the requisite medicines after making me – a cardiac patient – wait in the queue for over an hour. Veteran A: Ahh ECHS. They never have the medicines and the guys there talk so rude too. I keep telling them, “Wait till you retire beta; then you will know“.
ECHS or Ex-Servicemen Contributory Health Scheme is the second most favourite topic with us. Gone are the days when we used to be fitness freaks and talk at length about climbing this hill or that or trekking or going for cross-country runs. Earlier, our contribution towards our post-retirement health was to pay in advance for the treatment. Now, it is to go from pillar to post fetching medicines.
In the Annual General-body Meetings (AGMs) of the Navy Foundation, just about the only agenda items are those related to ECHS. It appears that happiness is spelt with a capital E; the moment we have sorted out all our ECHS problems, this bird called Happiness would sit on our window-sill and tweet our favourite tunes. Have a look at one of the AGMs in progress with this singular agenda point in various garbs:
In AGM after AGM we listen intently to how “in the near future” our ECHS problems would be sorted out.
With all our focus on medical and ECHS issues, one would feel that most veterans would look frail and ailing and as the saying goes one foot in the grave and other on a banana peel. Surprisingly, the number of octogenarians honoured every year during the AGMs is rather large:
(Octogenarians of 2015 AGM with the Navy Foundation (Mumbai) office-bearers.
Perhaps all the running around to get ECHS and medical issues sorted out and to obtain the treatment and medicines actually keeps them fit! They fully deserve the memento that’s given to them:
Memento given to honour the octogenarians.
This year the AGM was held in Lonavala. At the end of energetically discussing all the ECHS problems, our dedicated and forever witty Secretary informed the members that there is indeed good news: the Command Headquarters have informed the Navy Foundation that they would send a wreath (free of cost) for any veteran kicking the bucket and in case he is a gallantry award winner, then a bugle would be sent to play at his funeral. Needless to say this brought unrestricted smile to the faces of all veterans. Wow, a wreath and (in the case of lucky ones) a bugle!
If you see in the picture ladies smiling more than the men, it is because they would actually get to hear the bugle!
Life in the armed forces, for the veterans, was full of challenges and joys. Life after the armed forces is still full of challenges and joys. However, the most welcome and joyous part of the armed forces, as laid out for us, is death ushered in with flowers and bugles.
I find Human Evolution as a very fascinating subject. Humans or homo sapiens, as we see them around now, at some point of history of primates, separated themselves from the apes (hominids). Genetic studies bring out that the history of primates is older than 85 million years ago. There have been many theories (in the absence of recorded history we have either theories or gospel (word of mouth)) regarding the Evolution of Man, the foremost or the most accepted being the Darwinian theory. All these theories explore only the anatomical aspects; for example, the origin of man standing and walking on two feet and legs (bipedalism). Nothing has yet brought out the evolution of emotions and relationships, except in gospel. And that is the aspect that fascinates me most. For example, who was the first man or woman to fall in love? Or was it at the great ape stage or even earlier? When, how and why did the first man get angry and who triggered those emotions in him?
From emotions, relations and relationships are just the next logical steps, provided there has been some logic in evolution of these things. It is quite reasonable to assume that relations as we see them today have undergone dynamic changes in the thousands of years of evolution. Even if we believe gospel, for example, and assume that Adam and Eve were the only homo sapiens that were sent on Earth, their procreation, in terms of today’s relations would have produced only brothers and sisters. It would have stopped any further evolution of human-kind if they had considered procreation between brothers and sisters as sinful.
Family and Genes
It would be easy to consider that family and genes (both related to heredity) wouldn’t be exclusively human concepts. As humans, we are told (by sages and spiritual/religious leaders) that a feeling of I, My, Mine is the biggest obstacle that keeps us from true happiness and God (Sri Guru Granth Sahib refers to it as haume’) (Please read ‘Debatable Philosophies Of Life’). I had argued it out in the essay (that I have quoted above) that a feeling of myness is the most natural feeling in primates. No one needs to teach it even to apes and animals; they are naturally rejoicing in and protective of their progeny. So strong is this myness that it is imprinted on our genetic cells over generations; for example, we belong to a larger family having similarity of genes (heredity).
Even at that all-encompassing relationship of myness, it would be interesting to imagine the origin of specific familial relations, say, between father and son, husband and wife, uncles, aunts, brothers and sisters.
When did the concept of familial relations originate? (Pic courtesy: io9.gizmodo.com)
Blood Relations
Just as we have seen in the story of Adam and Eve, the concept of familial relations too has gone innumerable changes and modifications to arrive at the present accepted concept. The fact is that the present accepted concept is just a majority concept and is certainly not universal. In certain races or religions, for example, marriages are to take place within the family of blood relations only.
I have covered the concept of Religion and God in my essay ‘Whose God Is It Anyway?’ Lets, therefore, only ponder the concept of blood relations. It has become an important concept in legal circles and various tests are defined to prove blood relations. It would be easy to understand that the concept draws heavily from sexual reproduction (a physical phenomenon) and has nothing to do with one’s beliefs, biases and proclivities. Most often than not you don’t have to prove that you are brother and sister, mother and son, father and daughter. However, if inheritance, as seen by the law is at stake, you may have to prove that. It is another thing that at one time all of us may have belonged to one family. But, then, historically, as families became larger and larger, the concept of blood relations became narrower.
Human Relations Beyond Blood Relations
The fact is that increasingly human relations and relationships have become significantly more important than blood relations. One of the first ones to help propagate this concept was Lord Krishna. Even those who feel these tales are merely mythological (and have little historical basis), we are here talking about a concept that originated in India, which for the first time, more than 3000 years before Christ, made sacred a relationship beyond blood relation, even if forced by events or imagined events of that era. I am talking about the relationship between mother and child. Krishna was born to Devaki, the wife of Vasudeva. During the wedding of Krishna’s parents there was a prophecy that the eighth son of Devaki would kill the cruel Kansa. Since this prophecy was announced in the presence of Kansa (Devaki’s brother), he killed six sons that were born to Devaki. The seventh one Balarama escaped death by being transferred to the womb of Vasudeva’s other wife Rohini. Krishna escaped death by Vasudeva, his father, carrying him across Yamuna to his foster mother Yashoda (a wife of Nanda). In Hindu scriptures, Yashoda, the foster mother (not a blood relation) is far more important and revered than Devaki. In tales of Krishna-Leela, his childhood spent with Yashoda, is the most important period of episodic enchantment. Yes, this is not recorded history but gospel. However, this is the first time (even in folklore) that anyone called a relationship far more important than blood relation; the relationship of pure love that is.
Yashoda, the foster mother of Krishna playing with him (Pic courtesy: www.iskconbangalore.org)
Two important things to note here are (whether or not it is historical) is that the concretisation of the concept of blood relations in later-day India and the legal wranglings to prove blood relations (for inheritance) have radically moved away from this concept. This is all the more ironical since the Law itself has been an evolution over centuries and not something writ in stone. And the other follows from the first one itself, which is that even those who believe in Krishna, move the courts to prove blood relations. Hence, religion is not a way of life all the way but merely a philosophy of convenience; we believe in some parts and ignore others that stand in the way of pragmatism.
Husband – Wife Relationship
In Hinduism there is no relationship more sacred than the one between Krishna and Radha; so much so that Radha Krishna is considered as one name rather than a combination of two. And yet, though the concept of marriage was prevalent in that period (such as Devaki marrying Vasudeva; Krishna’s parents, that is), Krishna and Radha never married.
Some four thousand years (or more) after Krishna was believed to have been born to Devaki and Vasudeva, the Sanskrit poet Jayadeva (recorded history) wrote a famous poem Gita Govinda in the 12th century AD, and then the spiritual love between Radha and Krishna became the subject of intense folklore. Hence whilst Krishna is shown not as deity but God Himself, Radha, His devotee, is shown as the embodiment of love by a devotee towards God. The Hindus raised this Love by Radhe as even more important than God Himself (Krishna). And that’s why it is always Radha Krishna or Radhe Krishna and never Krishna Radha.
Human and God Relationship
The Adi Granth, the predecessor of present day Guru Granth Sahib, was compiled by the fifth Guru of the Sikhs – Guru Arjan Dev – in the sixteenth century. Thereafter, every Guru added something to it. The tenth and the last Guru, Guru Gobind Singh (whose name was one of the names of Krishna) didn’t add anything of his own but added all 115 hymns of his father Guru Teg Bahadur. In the year 1708, he decreed that after him there won’t be a human Guru but the Sikhs are to consider Guru Granth Sahib as their Guru.
The relationship between a devotee and God has been described in the Guru Granth Sahib by the first Guru – Guru Nanak – and curiously, it has drawn from the Radhe Krishna relationship: of between a wife and her husband. Guru Nanak portrayed the love of a suhagan (wife) for her husband as the purest form of devotion. He, of course, stressed upon the adornments for the suhagan being not material things like gold jewellery and diamonds but purity of heart and thoughts.
Take the case of Meerabai (born 1498). Meera Bai was born into a Rathore (Rajput) royal family of Kudki district of Pali, Rajasthan. Although born a princess, she renounced everything and became a devotee of Lord Krishna and considered herself married to Him. Since she flouted social and familial norms, she was persecuted by the society and especially by her in-laws. However, she didn’t desist from her chosen path. The Hindu scriptures, considering Devotee-God relationship as the one between wife and husband (Radhe Krishna), have widespread mention of the bhakti of Meera for Krishna as her husband, more than four thousand years after Krishna lived on earth.
More than four thousand years after Krishna, Meera again embodied the relationship between Devotee and God as being between wife and husband (Pic courtesy: lovekanha.blogspot.com)
Evolution of Modern Thought Process on Relations
Various rituals have been evolved over centuries to cement husband-wife relationship, the origin of all other familial relations.
The Saptapadi (Sanskrit for seven steps/feet), is the most important ritual of Vedic Hindu weddings, and represents the legal part of Hindu marriage. Sometimes called Saat Phere (seven rounds), couple conduct seven circuits of the Holy Fire (Agni), which is considered a witness to the vows they make to each other.
The Sikhs have Anand Karaj (blissful union introduced by Guru Amar Das (the third Guru) and involves four circuits around the Guru Granth Sahib (four lavan). Here God’s embodiment in the form of Guru Granth Sahib is considered witness to the holy marriage.
There are rituals in various other religions and castes most of them having some embodiment of God (such as agni, Guru Granth Sahib, Bible and other holy documents) as witness to the sacred marriage.
Guru Nanak, in his famous ‘Gagan mein thaal….’ arti in Jagannath Puri exhorted people to directly worship God (contained in His naam) rather than through any embodiment of God or deity (he refused to offer arti to Lord Krishna being only a deity when God Himself could be approached directly. Please read: ‘Nanak Shah Fakir – The Movie And Its Message‘). Curiously, this is one common element of all religions: they all know and feel that there is One God but the only real God is what they worship and all others are merely deities.
So the point is that the process of marriage is merely a ritual. Even if you want to make your marriage as sacred (marriages are, as is talked about in most religions and beliefs, made in heaven and then you are together for several lives (janam janam ka saath), merely chanting the name of God whilst accepting a person as your partner should be adequate for all purposes except for inheritance for which you have to legally prove your marriage.
Talking about dynamism or forever evolving concept of relationships, on the lighter side, in Mumbai (they must be elsewhere too) I have come across many couples whose male partners started off being Rakhi-Brothers (not blood brothers) (especially to widows) and who finally married their Rakhi Sisters.
Continuing with the lighthearted approach towards relations, I remember this anecdote of a divorced husband having to pay the bringing-up charges for his son (as part of alimony) until adulthood. On the first of every month, the son used to come calling at his blood father’s house, collect the alimony and go. On the first of a month just before the son’s 18th birthday, the father derisively told him, “Well, go back and tell your mother I am not your father anymore.” At this the son responded, “Mom wanted me to tell you that you never were”. Light-hearted alright, but that opens our eyes to the so called blood relations.
More and more people are now moving away from the religious rituals of weddings and for the purpose of legality of marriages for inheritance and other purposes getting married in courts (My son Arjun and daughter-in-law Samira did. Please read ‘Loveapalooza Arjun And Samira’s Lifetime Music Fest‘). Love is the strongest thread that need to be tied in order to complete the nuptials. Please recall that Guru Nanak, being a Hindu at that time, refused to wear the holy thread Janeyu as he said that no material symbols could replace oneness with God in thoughts.
Have the Hindi Movies Got it Right?
I am a fan and you would have seen it extensively in my blog posts. Whether or not the Hindi movies have got it right in other aspects of the movies, as far as evolution of relationships is concerned they seem to have kept pace and in many cases, several paces ahead.
Let me just give you three cases.
The first one is that of 1972 Shakti Samanta movie Amar Prem (Immortal Love) starring Rajesh Khanna and Sharmila Tagore. The film portrays the decline of human values and relationships (in blood relations, that is; Sharmila Tagore’s uncle sells her off as a courtesan) and contrasts it by presenting an outstanding example of a boy’s innocent love (Rajesh Khanna legally married to a wife who doesn’t care for him at all) for the same courtesan. A song about the decline of these relationships and double standards of people is a favourite of mine. It was penned by Anand Bakshi and composed by RD Burman in Raag Khammaj, Tal Kaherava. You must go through the lyrics in order to get the full meaning of these in the wake of discussions on relationships so far:
(kuchh to loga kahe.nge, logo.n kaa kaama hai kahanaa chho.Do bekaara kii baato.n me.n kahii.n biita naa jaae rainaa ) – 2 kuchha to loga kahe.nge, logo.n kaa kaama hai kahanaa
kuchha riita jagata kii aisii hai, hara eka subaha kii shaama huii – 2 tU kauna hai, teraa naama hai kyaa, siitaa bhii yahaa.N badanaama huii phira kyuu.N sa.nsaara kii baato.n se, bhiiga gaye tere nayanaa kuchha to loga kahe.nge, logo.n kaa kaama hai kahanaa chho.Do bekaara kii baato.n me.n kahii.n biita naa jaae rainaa kuchha to loga kahe.nge …
hamako jo taane dete hai.n, hama khoe hai.n ina ra.ngaraliyo.n me.n – 2 hamane unako bhii chhupa chhupake, aate dekhaa ina galiyo.n me.n ye sacha hai jhuuThii baata nahii.n, tuma bolo ye sacha hai naa kuchha to loga kahe.nge, logo.n kaa kaama hai kahanaa chho.Do bekaara kii baato.n me.n kahii.n biita naa jaae rainaa kuchha to loga kahe.nge
The second one is this 1969 Asit Sen movie Khamoshi (Silence) starring Rajesh Khanna and Waheeda Rehman. She is a nurse in the hospital where he is admitted with mental disorder caused by having been deceived in love by his beloved he wanted to marry. This song penned by Gulzar and composed by Hemant Kumar says it all as far as relationships are concerned; it suggests that the only true relationships are those of love:
Hamane dekhii hai un aa.Nkho.n kii mahakatii Kushabuu haath se chhuu ke ise rishto.n kaa ilzaam na do sirf ehasaas hai ye ruuh se mahasuus karo pyaar ko pyaar hii rahane do koii naam na do hamane dekhii hai un aa.Nkho.n kii mahakatii Kushabuu haath se chhuu ke ise rishto.n kaa ilzaam na do hamane dekhii hai
Pyaar koii bol nahii.n, pyaar aavaaz nahii.n ek Kaamoshii hai sunatii hai kahaa karatii hai na ye bujhatii hai na rukatii hai na Thaharii hai kahii.n nuur kii buu.Nd hai sadiyo.n se bahaa karatii hai
sirf ehasaas hai ye ruuh se mahasuus karo pyaar ko pyaar hii rahane do koii naam na do hamane dekhii hai un aa.Nkho.n kii mahakatii Kushabuu haath se chhuu ke ise rishto.n kaa ilzaam na do hamane dekhii hai
muskuraahaT sii khilii rahatii hai aa.Nkho.n me.n kahii.n aur palako.n pe ujaale se jhuke rahate hai.n ho.nTh kuchh kahate nahii.n, kaa.Npate ho.nTho.n pe magar kitane Kaamosh se afasaane ruke rahate hai.n
sirf ehasaas hai ye ruuh se mahasuus karo pyaar ko pyaar hii rahane do koii naam na do hamane dekhii hai un aa.Nkho.n kii mahakatii Kushabuu haath se chhuu ke ise rishto.n kaa ilzaam na do hamane dekhii hai
Surprisingly, the third one that I am giving is also from a Rajesh Khanna movie: the 1971 Hrishikesh Mukherjee movie Anand (Bliss). The song in which the truth about relationships occurs was also sung by Hemant da in Bengali. Here, it was penned by Yogesh and composed by Salil Chowdhury. Here are very meaningful lines about relationships:
Kahii.n to ye, dil kabhii, mil nahii.n paate Kahii.n se nikal aae, janamo.n ke naate
Love is the Greatest Relationship
Three months back I wrote an essay titled ‘Love – The Greatest Feeling On Earth‘. The relationship of Love is indeed the greatest relationship. And, it need not be between a husband and wife. Look at the relationship that a soldier has for the motherland (a son’s dedication for Bharat Mata). He is prepared to give his life for her and often does. There is a relationship of love between us and animals. Take this about our dog Roger and us:
The most important relation or relationship is not by virtue of rituals and ceremonies but what a person actually means to you. Rituals and ceremonies are for societal and legal purposes, for example for inheritance. And why should inheritance be the consideration in relationships since after you are gone, you don’t own anything anymore? As Shakeel Badayuni wrote:
Yeh zindagi ke mele,
Duniya mein kam na honge,
Afsos ham na honge.
You can go narrower and narrower in relations and relationships. The fact is that every man is a variation of yourself and you are indeed related to every person on earth by the colour of his or her blood. If you want to seek more refinement in this God made relationship, you can seek a relationship of Love.
Today happens to be the canonisation of Mother Teresa. She is now onwards Saint Teresa of Calcutta. Here is the relationship that made that possible:
One oft-repeated comment that I received on my ‘Olympics Are Biased Against Indians’ has been that I should write a fresh one for the just concluded Olympics. The article, people wrote, is hilarious; but, they want a fresh one too. So here it is, not during but after the Olympics. It is not hilarious but in my own straight-bat manner, I have tried to hit the nail on the head.
Whenever we as Indians discuss and debate any issue, just like in Arnab Goswami’s telly debates, we divide ourselves into we versus they; we are the good people with best interests of the country with us and they are the evil, inefficient, and corrupt lot who are hell-bent to take the country backwards. Shobha De, for example is us and the politicians and ministers who didn’t let Sakshi (a Bronze Medal winner in wrestling in Rio Olympics) speak in her own felicitation function (because they wanted to grab the limelight themselves) are they. And, these we and they keep changing places depending upon the flavour of the day; for, if there is one word that describes Indians, it is opportunists. We ain’t good competitors; but we are good opportunists. All of us.
‘One reason for evil to last is for good men to do nothing about it’. This should lead us to realise that not just they but we too are responsible for the situation we are in.
Nearly a year back I wrote an article in this blog titled: ‘Indians – Poor In Record – Keeping; Armed Forces No Exception’. In this, amongst other things, I had brought out that after the 1999 Kargil War, the citation for Grenadier Yogendra Singh Yadav, who received the highest military gallantry award that the country had to offer – the Param Vir Chakra, that is, read that he was being awarded this medal posthumously. The poor Grenadier went on record saying that he didn’t want a medal that killed him even when he was still alive. This is how much we cared about the medal given for the highest in gallantry. Reacting to this article, some of my army friends emotionally brought out that this happens in fog of war. For heavens sake we are talking about the highest gallantry award and the army didn’t know whether the recipient was dead or alive.
We Are Like That Only. There are no we versus they. All of us including me are to be blamed. I remember the time when the Anna Hazare movement was at its peak. Everyone expected that once we would sort out the corrupt politicians and bureaucrats through such instruments as Lokpal Bill, India would suddenly emerge as a corruption free nation. We conveniently forgot our own involvement in making the babus and netas corrupt and our penchant to seek short-cuts to success through greasing palms of these worthies.
We are indeed like that only.
Thus, before and during the Olympics, it is made to appear that medal-winners are worthy of our respect and emulation, except that we don’t seem to be having many.
First, lets take a quick count of medals won by us in all the Olympics so far. The modern version of Summer Olympics started in 1896 and India sent just one athlete Norman Gilbert Pritchard (later as Hollywood actor Norman Trevor) to the second of those in the year 1900. He won two Silver medals. But, he was of British parentage, born in Calcutta and in 1905 went to settle in Britain.
We didn’t send a team until the sixth Olympics in 1920 when a team of six men (four athletes and two wrestlers) and two managers participated. We drew a blank. We drew a blank again in 1924 when we sent a team of 14 (seven athletes and seven tennis players) with one manager.
Our first Olympic Gold came in the year 1928, in the eighth Olympics, when we sent a team of 21 (seven athletes and 14 hockey players with the manager GD Sondhi. We won the hockey finals. We won the hockey gold for the next five Olympics in succession. Hockey also helped us get our first Olympic Gold as an independent nation in the 1948 London Olympics.
The first Indian (and not of British parentage who just happened to be born in India when India was under the British) to win an individual medal was in the the twelfth Olympics, the 1952 Summer Olympics in Helsinki. Khashaba Dadasaheb Jadhav won a wrestling bronze in the Bantam Weight category. Despite his sterling performances in national events he nearly missed a berth for the Helsinki Olympics due to nepotism, the bane of Indian sports. He didn’t bow down to corruption in Indian sports but appealed to Maharaja of Patiala, himself a sports enthusiast. The Maharaja felicitated his entry in Olympic trials where Jhadav defeated his opponent who was otherwise billed to go to Olympics!
Jadhav in the centre in Helsinki Olympics 1952 (Pic courtesy: www.karad.mazegav.com)
What was the honour bestowed on him being the first Indian individual medal winner in Olympics? None, since he had earned the ire of the officials. Three years after the Helsinki Olympics, he joined as a sub-inspector in police. He continued winning domestic competitions. He was also a wrestling coach. He served in the police for 27 years and retired as Assistant Police Commissioner and since he had learnt to fight in wrestling, they made him fight for his pension. He was a pariah of the sports federations and thus neither a Padma Shri nor any riches were bestowed on him. He died of a tragic accident in 1984. In the last few years of his life and until his death, he was a poor man. That is India’s first individual medal winner. Do you think any industry in India, any organisation, any philanthropist supported him? The answer is none.
The last Olympics before India became independent were held in 1936 in Berlin and our team size was 27 competitors (four athletes, three wrestlers, one Burmese weight-lifter, and a hockey team of 19) and three officials including manager G D Sondhi. As soon as we became independent, our team size bulged to 79 and from 3 sports and we suddenly started taking part in ten sports. In 1952 Helsinki Olympics, for the first time we sent 3 women. Thus, after their inception in 1896, it is only in the twelfth Olympics that we sent women (there were no Olympics held in 1916 due to World War I and 1940 and 1944 due to World War II).
In Hockey, we have won a total of 11 medals including 8 Golds, 2 Silver and 1 Bronze. In individual medals, thanks to the deplorable treatment meted out to Khashaba Dadasaheb Jadhav, our next individual medal came only in 1996 (23rd Olympics) when Leander Paes won a Bronze in Tennis (men’s Singles). Leander Paes competed in consecutive Olympics from 1992 to 2016 making him the only tennis player in the world to have participated in seven Olympics.
He has been bestowed with many awards. He has received the Rajiv Gandhi Khel Ratna award, India’s highest sporting honour, in 1996–97; the Arjuna Award in 1990; the Padma Shri award in 2001 and its 3rd Highest Civilian Award the Padma Bhushan in January 2014 for his outstanding contribution to tennis in India.
At this juncture let me bring out that there is money in tennis and cricket. Yuvraj, for example, instantly won a crore rupees for hitting six sixes in an over. The reason is that both these sports are well suited for advertisements in between the overs and the games and there are huge advertisement budgets and sponsorships involved in both the games.
Compare these with an event that both our men and women have been winning since its inception in 2004, the Kabaddi World Cup, that is. So far, there have been seven world cups for men and three for women (since 2012). We have won all the seven golds for men and all the three golds for women. But, have a look at the women waiting for and finally getting into an auto-rickshaw after winning the World Cup:
(Pic courtesy: www.sportskeeda.com)
If you go on the net or check the newspapers, you would get to see our former sports persons who brought glory to the nation languishing in poverty. Here are a few of those pics:
I am not going to fill this entire blog with numerous stories of neglect of sports persons even after they made the country proud.
Lets take one of the most famous: Shankar Lakshman who was the goalkeeper of the Indian team in the 1956, 1960 and 1964 Olympics, that won two gold medals and one silver medal. He was the first goalkeeper to become Captain of an international hockey team and was awarded the Arjuna award and the Padma Shri by the Indian government. He was Captain of the Indian team which won the gold in the 1966 Asian Games. After missing the selection for the 1968 Olympics, Lakshman quit hockey. He remained with the Army, retiring in 1979 as a Captain of the Maratha Light Infantry. He lived the final years of his life in poverty, and died in 2006 after suffering gangrene in one leg, in Mhow.
Shankar Lakshaman, the Indian hockey goalkeeper, with whom we won two Golds and one Silver died in poverty
Lets take just one more case, that of Sita Sahu. This intrepid 15-year-old at the time of 2011 Special Olympics at Athens won for the country two Bronze medals: in 200 m relay race and in 1600 m race. What does she do now? She still lives in abject poverty and sells golgappas and paapdi chaats.
Sita Sahu, winner of two Bronze medals at Special Olympics in Athens in 2011, selling golgappas and chaats to survive
In our characteristic style we blame the netas and the babus and the self-serving officials of sports federations in India, very sure in our minds that we ourselves have no role to play in this rot. And then we blame the money spinning games of cricket and tennis for the neglect of other sports.
Who goes to see the cricket and tennis matches? We do. Who goes and spends hours and days watching tamasha (spectacle) at the IPL? We do. Indian sports persons have won a total of only 28 medals in all the Olympics so far that include two of Norman Pritchard and 11 of Hockey; a miserable 15 medals in 28 Olympics. Six of these were won in London Olympics and two in Rio. This means that we just had seven individual medals to our credit in 26 Olympics.
“At the present juncture, I am sorry to say, we are doomed to be what we bemoaned at one time: ‘a rich country inhabited by the poor’; except that now, poor is defined as ‘poor in character‘.
Everyone of us has to bring in (and do so proudly) discipline in our individual and collective lives.”
Lets face it; we love tamasha (spectacle) whether in sports or in religion or in anything we do. Everything has to be seen in money terms. IPL interests us because it is a media-made tamasha, that makes us feel great just like three hours spent watching a Hindi movie takes us away from the reality of the squalor and misery that we still live in.
And if we feel that the political leaders are responsible for this mess, think again. Who elects them? We do.
During the height of Anna Hazare movement, I wrote several articles as to why the movement would fail unless we are involved in clearing the mess and not leave it to them to do so. My only poem in Punjabi (my mother tongue) was ‘Anne Na Raho (Don’t Remain Blind)’ bringing out our own responsibility in electing the right people and not just toss a coin and vote or not to wait at all.
And, mind you, we are talking about medals won in sports. As a nation we don’t have respect for those who won gallantry medals at the risk of their lives or often sacrificing their lives for the country.
Here is a spectacle of veterans returning their medals in protest against the non-implementation of One Rank One Pension. Who cares? We don’t.
Veterans returning their hard-earned medals during an OROP Rally (Pic courtesy: timesofindia.indiatimes.com)
Next time, following the advice of our former and most respected President: Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam, rather than pointing finger at the political bosses and some other officials, lets point a finger at ourselves and begin with ourselves to set things right. Lets take a pledge, for example, that we shall desist from such tamasha as IPL and encourage our athletes and other sportsmen, even if the current entertainment value of watching them is little.
Lets all win together and not make it look like that they are us if they win and they are they if they lose.
It was on this day, 15th August, in the year 1947, when we received Freedom at Midnight. Our first Prime Minister of independent India made his famous Tryst with Destiny speech to the Indian Constituent Assembly in the Parliament, a speech that is counted amongst the most famous speeches in the history of the world. The opening two paragraphs of this speech are:
“Long years ago we made a tryst with destiny, and now that time comes when we shall redeem our pledge, not wholly or in full measure, but very substantially. At the stroke of today’s midnight hour, when the world sleeps, India will awake to life and freedom. A moment comes, which comes but rarely in history, when we step out from the old to new, when an age ends, and when the soul of a nation, long suppressed, finds utterance.
It is fitting that at this solemn moment we take the pledge of dedication to the service of India and her people and to the still larger cause of humanity with some pride.”
Just as I did with the Republic Day five and half years ago, in 2011 (Please read: ‘How Proud Should We Be Of The Indian Republic At 62?’), I have to be the devil’s advocate and suggest that though, of course, freedom is a great thing and we fought hard to get it back (having lost it to the British two hundred years before winning it back), there are a few freedoms that we have granted ourselves and we can do without some, if not all of them. Just as I did with the Republic Day, then, these are our reality check nearly seventy years after we won independence.
1. Freedom to Urinate and Defecate in Public and to Litter. I don’t know at what point of time in history we acquired these habits that not only make our villages, towns and cities filthy but also make us spend enormous money, resources and efforts to clean up our act, whether in our holiest river Ganga or anywhere else. If the cost of diseases and epidemics has to be added, it is a freedom that has already done enormous damage to the country, let alone its image abroad. Basically, this freedom emanates from the we versus the authorities rebellious attitude that we have and that we are proud of having won us the independence (the Civil Disobedience Movement, that is, during the British time). Try stopping a man chucking out empty soft-drink tetrapaks from the train or the bus; he would immediately come up with the argument, “What do you think that the sweepers are paid for from the taxes we pay? Let them do some work once in a while rather than sit on their haunches.” I was posted in the city of Vizag on the Eastern coast. Before I could obtain accommodation with the Navy, I rented a house in a civil locality. Whereas another country in the East, Japan that is, is called ‘Land of the Rising Sun’, the civil localities in Vizag could be easily called ‘Land of the Rising Bums’. One would see many of these if one ever went for early morning walks after following the English motto: ‘Early to bed early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise’. In Vizag, if one went for a walk too early and not able to sight the gooey stuff on the sides of the road, one would not be anywhere near healthy or wealthy. One would be wise though to have a bath immediately on return.
2. Freedom to Molest and Rape. Am I the only one who feels that this so called freedom is as serious an issue as to be at the level of freedom for some people? Nearly three and half years ago, I wrote an essay titled ‘Nirbhaya’s Rape – A National Shame, Time To Look Within’. This essay was written immediately after the most infamous rape case in the national capital that took place in Dec 2012. It shook the national conscience. And then many skeletons in our national cupboard came tumbling out. For example, there was this minister in the Goa Assembly who asserted that women who dressed provocatively deserved to be raped. Imagine a responsible representative of the people saying that! We also had the unseemly sight of elected representatives blithely watching pornography in the assembly whilst government business was being transacted (Please read: ‘Guardians Of Porn And Morality’). In the same article about Porn and Morality, I brought out about a play I directed and acted in the Navy: Mahesh Dattani’s ’30 Days In September’. The play was about the incidence of incest in the country. Whilst researching on the topic, I came across government figures given in the parliament by Ms Renuka Chaudhary, the then Minister for Women’s Affairs and Child Welfare. She brought out that about 49 percent children in our country are victims of incest and child-abuse; a large percentage of these being at the hands of known and close relatives. Women are still considered in various sections of the society as mard ke pair ki jooti (footwear for the men) (Please read: ‘Is There Reason To Celebrate Women’s Day In India?’) We can certainly do without these freedoms to molest, rape and indulge in child abuse and incest.
4. Freedom to Use Public Funds and Resources as Own. This freedom is of gigantic proportions in our country, particularly so with elected representatives and bureaucrats; the latter have recently appealed that they not be called by the derogatory term ‘babus’. It will be only sooner than later when the elected representatives also appeal that they not be called by the derogatory (!) term ‘netas‘. What an irony! In both cases, if we have to examine as to who demeaned these terms, one would get the quick answer that those who are now appealing against being called these are themselves responsible for it. The Indian constitution has a term called ‘Public Servant’; both these form the bulk of the representatives of the government who are so described. A ‘Public Servant’ is not a derogatory term but a reminder to such people that they hold their positions for the service of the people. However, these self-serving people feel that the only reason that they are there is to enjoy power and the perks of the positions that they hold. This freedom to consider public funds and resources as their own has been the subject of many a blog-post from me that you would find in this very blog.
5. Freedom to Take Law in One’s Hands. Almost everyone indulges in this in India; we are amongst the most unlawful people on earth. Drivers even in the national capital, for example, drive through red light on a traffic crossing, with impunity, if they feel no one is watching. This is a freedom that we have gifted ourselves (Please read ‘We Are Like That Only’). It has nuisance value on the roads in addition to it being dangerous. Our national figures are:
Over 1,37,000 people were killed in road accidents in 2013 alone, that is more than the number of people killed in all our wars put together.
16 children die on Indian roads daily.
5 lives end on Delhi’s roads everyday.
There is one death every four minutes due to a road accident in India.
And yet, we have a tendency to take shortcuts with any rule or law not just on the roads but everywhere.
It is of alarming proportion when those whose duty it is to maintain law and order routinely indulge in unlawful activities. Amnesty International, for example, repeatedly brings out the flagrant incidents of police excesses and custodial deaths and violations of human rights (Read, for example: Bhagalpur Blindings of 1980 when the Bihar Police blinded 31 under-trial people by pouring acid into their eyes). However, so used to are these people to enjoy their self-ascribed freedoms that they don’t seem to care. Here is something sickening in the news just three days before the 70th Independence Day:
One third of the districts of our country now openly oppose Indian law mainly because of such freedoms enjoyed by our so-called public-servants. Isn’t it high time that we restrict these so called self-ascribed freedoms and do our bit towards nation-building that the famous ‘Tryst with Destiny’ speech of our first Prime Minister exhorted us to do 69 years back?
The danger is palpable: if we don’t follow the evolutionary way, we face the revolutionary way; and revolutions are often (if not always) bloody and violent.
Secondly, why do I have to write posts about this colony? It is simply because after retirement from the Indian Navy in end Feb 2010 I made this colony my home for the rest of my life and whatever happens here affects me in a huge manner.
Thirdly, why this queer title of the post: ‘Hell In The JVDE (Kharghar) – A ‘War’ Movie In The Making!’? Let me explain:
I saw this 1968 World War II film titled Hell In The Pacific (starring Lee Marvin and Toshirō Mifune, the only two actors in the entire film) in the New Empire theatre in South Bombay in a matinée show after I became a commissioned officer in the Indian Navy. The film is a story of two military men, an American pilot and a Japanese navy captain, marooned on an uninhabited Pacific island, who, in order to survive, must accept their differences and work together, despite their two countries being at war.
The film was entirely shot in the Rock Islands of Palau in the north Pacific Ocean, near the Philippines in the Philippine Sea. A curious historical factual coincidence was that somewhere near there, on an island, an American and a Japanese soldiers were actually discovered many years after the war; they kept plotting against each other many years after the World War II ended since on that island they had no means of knowing that the war had been called off.
In real life too, both actors served for their respective countries during the Pacific War. Marvin, who was in the US Marines, was wounded and received the Purple Heart during the Battle of Saipan in 1943. Mifune served in the Imperial Japanese Army Air Service.
And now, perhaps you will understand the title of the post. Retired IAF and IN personnel, despite my best efforts and those of my other well-meaning colleagues, are still at war with one another in JVDE (Kharghar) and they ain’t on a remote island! Who is to tell them that the hostilities have been called off? And that, now, they must work together for the well-being and survival of JVDE (Kharghar).
The following scene from the movie could very well be between the previous MC (Managing Committee of JVDE who were voted out last year) holding by throat the new MC (duly elected) and not allowing it to do its assigned job. What does the previous MC have to gain by it? Well, the same that the British had to gain by their crafty policy of ‘Divide and Rule’.
(Photo courtesy: cinezinekane.com)
Last month, the previous MC guys, in a bid to prove that though they didn’t fight the (re)elections for the MC last year, they were indeed the God’s gift to JVDE during their tenure, called for a calling-attention Special General Body Meeting (SGM) of JVDE. The agenda was only one; which is, that the new MC was doing enormous harm by not following the confrontational and spy versus spy approach of the previous MC, which had successfully made disharmony as the way of life in the Society. It was a sheer wastage of time for all of us since they were hell-bent on proving by rhetoric what is against the commonsense of majority of the members.
I had broken my silence of the last few years during that SGM and reminded these members that the number one issue concerning our Society is to actually restore peace and harmony, trust and camaraderie. I was supported by an unambiguous voice vote. Undeterred, the JVDE rabble-rousers immediately after the SGM, renewed and even doubled their efforts to disrupt normal functioning of the Society. As far as they are concerned, every plan and effort of the new MC has to be somehow countered and opposed. Every issue of JVDE has to be connected with the single-point agenda of the last MC, that is, the so-called Encroachment Issue. So far, they have made all out efforts to link Fire Safety of the buildings and the Land Conveyance Deed to the Encroachment Issue. This has been done so as to justify the five years of their tenure that they dissipated on this non-issue to the exclusion of any other scheme for the welfare of the Society.
Take the case of this rabble-rouser group’s strident opposition to Rain Water Harvesting (RWH) on Terraces of the buildings. They already know that it would actually solve the rampant leakages problems in buildings for which in the five years of their tenure they were able to do nothing. They have already sensed the danger to their relevance as rabble-rousers and hence have started an all out campaign not to let it happen.
Two buildings: Tulip and Daffodil (all buildings in JVDE have been named after flowers not knowing that there are people in the Society forever in love with thorny issues) are due for major repairs and hence the works committees of these buildings had approached the present MC for installation of RWH with twin aims: One, it would result in rain water harvesting, which buildings in Mumbai and Navi Mumbai are increasingly undertaking so as to get over perpetual water shortages. And two, the shed over the terraces would keep the terraces dry and prevent the perpetual leakages the top floors face due to bad design and construction. Have a look at the pictures below and remember that since the original construction of JVDE buildings and until now we have not been able to arrest the leakages in buildings; the number two issue facing the Society (the first being restoration of Peace, Harmony, Trust and Camaraderie), that the previous MC wasn’t able to do a fig about because of focus on only one issue: the so called encroachments.
Of course, there are many other measures to keep the terraces clean and dry, in addition to the above. However, the intransigence of some of the members of the previous MC (they actually want the focus to return to a single point agenda of the so-called encroachments) is keeping the present MC from implementing any of these plans.
Time has therefore come in the society whence most of us (if not all of us) must abandon the earlier path chosen by the previous MC of confrontation, mistrust, hostility and suspicion (and doing nothing else) and think in terms of being participants with the present Managing Committee for the well-being of the Society.
I am, by no means suggesting (since some of the rabble-rousers are adept at twisting every word of others) that there should be no opposition to the ideas and plans of the Managing Committee. We should debate and discuss, in civilized fashion, all significant issues of the Society. However, we should shun the highly disruptive approach adopted by some of these people who have vested interests in ensuring peace, harmony and well-being don’t ever return to JVDE.
Let us all join hands in ensuring that ‘Hell In The JVDE (Kharghar) – A ‘War’ Movie In The Making!‘ is stopped here and now and bring home to the handful of rabble-rousers that their disruptive methods are not appreciated and won’t succeed.
P.S. Please do feel free to give your comments below. When the comments on my last article were published, the rabble-rousers had this to say to me: “All favourable comments to your article are by those who have encroached upon common-spaces in the buildings”. However, I publish all comments, whether favourable to me or not, except when comments become rhetoric and even longer than the article itself!
almanac at the times of morning and evening nautical twilights (when both the stars and the horizon can be seen by the naked eye), thus measuring their exact angle with the earth’s horizon in degrees, arcminutes and arcseconds. The idea was to fix the position of a ship at sea, far from shore objects, in comparison to the known position of some of these 57 navigational stars. Naturally, in order to fix the position of the ship with some accuracy, one would have to get 
more than two bearing lines. The accuracy and the fastness of the observations would ensure that most of the bearing lines (from more than two stars) would meet at a point and that would be the fixed position of the ship. Without boring you with complex details, this in essence is the theory of the celestial navigation, also known as astronavigation. During our formative years in the navy, all of us had to learn the intricacies of the astronavigation.
