Kuve mein kood ke mar jaana
Yaar tum shaadi mat karna
The song was put up by me in the Kishore Kumar Songs Flash Fest on my Facebook group ‘Yaad Kiya Dil Ne‘ on 04 Aug, the birth anniversary of Kishore Kumar.
Which Kishore Kumar do you Like Better?
He was the most versatile man the Hindi Films industry ever produced. He was producer, director, story writer, lyricist, music director, singer and actor.
At this moment he would be funny and comical. At the next moment he could sing something really serious such as Chingari koi bhadke. He would act with hens and cocks in one moment (Haal kaisa hai janaab ka) and next he could act as the serious Rahi in Door Ka Rahi (a movie that he made to satiate an inner quest).
Today, to start with, I have decided to give you his funny side.
Funny Kishore Kumar
I can think of scores of songs by Kishore da which are funny in lyrics, in singing style, in situational comedy and in their message. But, even I have to think hard to come up with funnier lyrics and acting than this song. It is from the 1956 movie Parivar (Family).
Before I go further into the song, I will tell you my own association with the song. I had described this in an issue of the Navy Foundation magazine called Quarterdeck in an article called ‘A REAL LIFE PLAY OF INS AGRANI OR NAVY‘.
I was asked to prepare a play in Navy’s Leadership establishment called INS Agrani and take it to Cochin to participate in the Southern Naval Command Annual Dramatic Championship. Why me? Because I was the junior most officer there! I roped in another officer and we started searching for a suitable play. With just a week to go for the championship, we hadn’t found a play.
That night, I wrote the script for a three-act-play titled Hamara Drama (Our Drama). Whatever we had done in search and preparation for the play was put in the first two acts. In the last act, Bajwa (my friend whom I had selected to help me) and I were sitting dejected that we still didn’t have a play and that everything had failed. And then yet another brainwave occurred to me and I told him, “Why don’t we present our search for a suitable play and a cast as a play…is mein khushi hai, gham hai, bebasi hai, suspense hai, comedy hai, tragedy hai….aur kahin kahin to paagalpan bhi hai…hahahaha…hahahaha (there is joy in it, sadness in it, helplessness, suspense, comedy, tragedy…and at places, there is madness too)..exactly like our navy life..” The play ended there with a freeze shot.
When we went to Cochin for presenting the play, our hearts sank seeing the plays of other establishments. Each one of them had elaborate sets, cast, background music and other props. We had nothing. But, now, at that late stage could do nothing about it. Ours was the last play on the second day. Each play was to be one hour’s duration with ten minutes given for changing sets. During our preparation time, Bajwa and I were sitting with the audience in uniform. When the curtain opened, we got up from the audience and performed on stage.
It was a riot. The audience roared with every dialogue. For example, at one stage, I told Bajwa that I could do the famous Rajesh Khanna’s Anand movie dialogue, “Babu moshaye, ye zindagi ek rang manch hai aur ham sabb ismein kaam karne wali kathputliyan; in kathputliyon ki dore ooper waale ke haath mein hai. Kab, kahan, kaise kis kis ko uthana hai ye koi nahin jaanata…ha, ha, ha…ha, ha, ha..(Sir, this life is a stage and we are like puppets on a stage; the strings of these puppets are held by God. Who, where, when would be lifted by Him, no one knows.” And Bajwa asked me on stage, “But, what has this got to do with the naval audience?” And then I told him that we could modify it…and I enacted the modified dialogue:
“Babu moshaye, yeh navy ek rang manch hai aur hum sabb is mein kaam karne waale afsar ya sailor. Ham sabaki dore DOP (Directorate of Personnel) ke haath mein hai. Kabb, kaise, kahan kis kis ka transfer ho jaaye yeh koi nahin jaanata..ha, ha, ha…ha, ha, ha…”
I espied C-in-C and his wife in the front row having side-splitting laughs. It was difficult to proceed from one dialogue to the other throughout the play as the laughter and applause won’t die down. No one could believe we could actually present a play, a humorous take on how we did things in the Navy or for that matter in the armed forces.
The jury was unanimous in voting for Hamara Drama as the Best Play and yours truly as the Best Actor. INS Agrani and we were all about leading from the front. I am sure the tradition continues.
I sang this song when the jury was deciding! The spectators roared and literally forced jury to give us all the awards!
The Movie
The movie has been directed by another great Bengali Asit Sen and has our group’s heroine Usha Kiran acting opposite Kishore Kumar. The story is by Panchu Mukherji. The story is about a joint family consisting of four brothers, their wives, and their respective children, living under one roof. Some of the brothers are professionals, one a lawyer, a doctor, and others businessmen. They are a happy family, living and sharing each other’s joys and sorrows. Then one day, an argument breaks out over a glass of milk, and the entire family is thrown into chaos, and the only resolution seems to be nothing but dividing the entire property amongst the brothers and their respective families.
After the film was completed and the unit dissolved, according to an interview by the lead actress Usha Kiran, the unit members wept miserably, so strong was the bondage developed between members during the course of the film-making. The entire unit literally lived up to it’s name Parivar, meaning family.
My Own Poetry
It is called:
हम बीवी को बुलाते थे जान, चाँद, सनम और रानी,
पर एक दिन सर के ऊपर से निकल गया पानी
नाम हमारे दिमाग में आये चार सौ अस्सी
और बीवी का नाम बड़े सोच के रखा “रस्सी”
“कया अजब नाम है?” सोचा होगा आपने
आज तक ऐसा नाम नहीं रखा किसी के बाप ने
“इसके क्या माईने हैं कुछ तो ससमझाईये
हमें बुझारतों में इस तरह ना उलझायिये”
हमने कहा, “इसमें बुझारत की क्या बात है?
“रस्सी” का मतलब बिलकुल साक्षात है:
यह जल जाती है पेर बल नहीं जाता
हमारी मेहबूबा का भी कल नहीं जाता”
“वो कल जब माईके में उन्का राज था
भाई काम करते थे और इनको ना कोई काज था
अब पति करता है दिन रात इनकी सेवा
और ये खाती हैं मखमल पर बैठ के मेवा”
“मेरी गरदन में बड़े प्यार से पड़ जाती है
अच्छे भले मुलाजिम की जान निकल जाती है
हुमने सोचा था यह बनेगीं प्यार की डोरी
पर इन्हों ने रस्सी बनके की जोरा जोरी”
यारो अगर बीवी भी बन जाये गले में फंदा
और तुम रहना चाह्ते हो इस जहान में ज़िन्दा
डोरी को कभी ना बनने दो रस्सी या संगल
तभी रहेंगे तुम्हारे दिन व रात मंगल
The Song
And now, lets glance at who put this song together for Kishore Kumar to perform on the stage? Lyricist is Shailendra! Wow, how can anyone of his emotional set-up write something as funny as this? The composer is Salil da (another Bengali who, like SD Burman, can give vent to the funny and light-hearted songs; don’t forget he wrote a funny satire called Parakh). The singer is Kishore himself.
Please enjoy: Kuve mein kood ke mar jaana, yaar tum shaadi mat karna…..(PLEASE WATCH THIS. THIS IS THE ULTIMATE FUNNY SONG):
कुवे में
कुवे में कूद के मर जाना
यार तुम शादी मत करना
कुवे में कूद के मर जाना
यार तुम शादी मत करना
कुवे में कूद के मर जाना
यार तुम शादी मत करना
मत करना
कुवे में कूद के मर जाना
यार तुम शादी मत करना
देखि दिल्ली की एक लड़की
जिसको देख तबियत फड़की
मुख से आह निकल गई थोड़ी
अंदर अंदर आग सी भडकी
उसका नाम घराना पूछा
उसका ठौर ठिकाना पूछा
अपने दिल की उमगे लेकर पहुंचा
मैं उसके बगल पर
अपने दिल की उमगे लेकर पहुंचा
मैं उसके बगल पर
जाते ही झुक के सलाम बजाया
डैडी को दिल का बायां सुनाया
भोले भाले डैडी बोले
हाँ हाँ जी हाँ हाँ जी
अच्छा ख्याल है आपका दीजिए
मुझे पता अपने बाप का
आपके बाप को चिठ्ठी के ज़रिए बता दूंगा
जी अच्छा ख्याल है आपका
चाय पिलाऊँ के ठण्डा मागउँ
ओय होय ओय होय
चाय पिलाऊँ के ठण्डा मागउँ
के मुर्गी के अंडे की भुर्जी बनाऊं
चाय पिलाऊँ के ठण्डा मागउँ
के आड़े खिलौन के भुरजी बनाउन
हंस कर जब वो लड़की बोली
मेरे दिल पे चल गई गोली
मेरे मन के बताशे टूटे
आखिर मान गए प्रभु रूठे
तेरी जा जय हो करतार
तेरी जा जय हो करतार
तेरी जा जय हो करतार
हो तेरी जय जय हो करतार हो
तेरी जय जय हो करतार हो
तेरी जय जय हो करतार हो
तेरी जय जय हो करतार
अरे बाप रे
इतने में आ गया उसका भाई
ज़ालिम निकला बड़ा ही कॅशे
कहने लगा
मुंह और मसूर की दाल वे
निकल जा
यहां से चांडाल के बच्चे
उसका भाई था बाक्सर भरी
उसका भाई था बाक्सर भरी
उसने की हमले की तैयारी
मैं तो दम को दबाकर भागा
मैं तो दम को दबाकर भागा
रास्ते में बोलै मन का कागा क्या क्या
कुवे में
यार तुम शादी मत करना
खुद के छेदे कवरे थे हम
जा पहुंचे होलो लु लु
वहाँ पे मिस्टेर वो कहलाये
यहाँ के भोला सिंग भोलू
होलो लु लु….
हिट गीत पिट बिना लंच ब्रेक
फ़ास्ट चय सोडा वाटर
एक थे नयी दुनिया में पहुंचे
वहांठे सुब बरोथेर सिस्टर
होलो लु लु….
गोल्डन रम्भा संभा
हे बेम चिक बेम चिक
गिटार गोंगा सोंगा
बेम चिक बेम चिक
वो लड़की थी या बिजली
था उसका नाम मिस खम्भा
बेम चिक बेम चिक
कुछ खेल हुवा कुछ मेल हुवा
दी फेल हुवा हाय हाय रे
बबलू बबलू…
बबलू बबलू…
वो रात भयानक काली थी
भावे भोवे कुत्ते रोते थे
हम जाग रहे थे बिस्तर पे
भगवन भी शायद सोते थे
आगे पीछे देखा ही नहीं
कल क्या होगा सोचा ही नहीं
साडी कर ली
मिस खम्भा से साडी कर ली
फिर रोज़ रात को
फिर रोज़ रात को सातप
फिर रोज़ सवेरे गेत पूत गेट आउट
गेत पूत गेट आउट गेट गो गो
तू तू में में से नो नो
फिर एक रात को मैं तो
दम को दबाकर भागा
मैं तो दम को दबाकर भागा
रास्ते में बोलै मन का कागा क्या क्या
कुवे में कूद के मर जाना
यार तुम शादी मत करना
कुवे में कूद के मर जाना
यार तुम शादी मत करना
हम तो जहाँ गए ठोकर सकीय
कोई न जाने पीड़ पराई
राम ने पांचो बूत मिलाये
एक मेरी जोड़ी न मिलायी
मेरा हाल देख के न
यार तुम शादी मत करना
कुवे में कूद के मर जाना
यार तुम शादी मत करना
मत करना
कुवे में कूद के मर जाना
यार तुम शादी मत करना.
There are many funny songs in Hindi movies and yet there is nothing as funny as how it was sung by Kishore Kumar. Even among his funny songs, this reigns even over Ek chatur naar from Padosan.
I hope you enjoyed it.
