Today is Guru Purnima, the day to pay homage to one’s teacher or Guru.
I was born a Sikh. Hence, as commanded by our tenth Guru Gobind Singh ji, we have the living body of Guru in the form of Sri Guru Granth Sahib ji at home. That is obvious. As I go along, I shall mention how it helped me to be guided by SGGS ji.
Another obvious ones are my parents. Both my dad and my mom taught by their example. As I go along I shall mention these too. Their influence in making the person I became is immeasurable.
However, today, on Guru Purnima day, I have chosen to pay homage to my biggest Guru: Scarcity. No, not Adversity but Scarcity. Adversity is a state of mind; scarcity is only a physical condition. In doing so I am paying homage to my parents too.
Like most Sikhs, I read from the SGGS ji daily. When I was small, my dad insisted that we as a family sit together, once a day, to pray. I learnt that being poor at heart was a virtue. We didn’t have to adapt this principle. We were poor and not just at heart. One reason for it was that my dad and mom didn’t expect and accept anything from anyone. My dad worked in the horticulture department in Himachal (a North Indian hilly state). After he died, I discovered that he had paid for everything that he received from the department: fruits, canned and bottled stuff. And yet, dad was the richest person that I ever came across. He gave freely.
In my first ever class in a school (Government Primary School, Kandaghat, Himachal), one day (as told by my mom) I returned home and apologetically asked my mom if we had any money. Mom was fearful that I fancied some toy or sweet. She asked: “Bubble (for some reason I was nicknamed this by my dad), kaade waaste paise chahide ne?” (Bubble, what do you require money for?) And I replied fearfully, “Fees deni hai.” (To pay (school) fees).
Dad and mom gave us the best education, schooling and life possible. Our style of living and my dad’s passion for giving freely to people belied the scarcity we felt at home. He was a great follower of ‘Atithi devo bhava‘ (The guest is akin to God). The best at home was always given to the guests. My mom was publicly embarrassed by my dad in case she neglected to give the guests something she felt would add to perennial scarcity. For example, lets say, dad had got some sweets and she thought of not serving to the guests, dad would say in front of the guests, “Kyun mithai nahin khilani ehna nu?” (Why are you not serving the sweets to them?)
I sincerely believe God loved my parents. He always gave them enough; I don’t know how and where from it came, but it was always there. In my later life, I felt, God loved my wife and I too for we too had enough. Just a few years before retiring from the Indian Navy, I gave us an Archie’s plaque on our anniversary, which read: ‘We don’t have much but we have each other.”
Dad and mom worked very hard. Before, they could have even the remotest semblance to plenty, my dad died in a jeep accident. The kind of scarcity that we were driven into was to be seen to be believed. As an example, mom and I sold empty bottles, newspapers and other junk at home to pay off a creditor. Then, I have brought a cooking gas cylinder from 16 Kms away by bicycle so as to save the bus-fare.
My parents and scarcity taught me some invaluable lessons. Today, on Guru Purnima day I shall try to put these down:
- Unshakable Belief in God. Sri Guru Grant Sahib ji has this thought on numerous occasions. In the very early part of SGGS one comes across this one from our fifth Guru Arjan Dev ji in Raag Goojari:”Kahe Re Man Chitweh Udham Ja Aahar Har Jio Dharia
(O my mind, why you keep on worrying about livelihood, when God Himself is taking care of it.
(this does not mean that one should not work for a livelihood. What this means is that one should make the honest effort but not worry about the results).Sael Pathar Meh Jant Upaye Ta Ka Rijak Aage Kar Dharia”
(Look, even for those creatures He created in rocks and stones (tiny worms), He provided their livelihood in advance (even before they were born).There is repeated mention in SGGS ji about the uselessness of worrying. At the end of the SGGS ji, the ninth Guru says this in one of the Slokas:
Chinta – Taki keejiye jo anhoni hoei,
(You should worry if something unexpected or impossible is going to happen. The true meaning of this is that everything is as ordained by God and we are His children. Why should we worry when He would have thought of the best for us).And look at what he (Gur Tegh Bahadur ji) says in the next line of the sloka:
Eh marg sansar ka, Nanak thir nahin koei”
(The world has been created in such a way that nothing is forever)My maternal grandparents have great faith in their Hari Babaji (a devotee of Lord Krishna). Once when they approached him in adversity for advice, he wrote:
“Achhe din bhi nahin rehate, bure din bhi nahin rehate. Sainyam rakhiye. Sab theek hoga.” (Good days don’t last, bad days don’t last. Keep self-restraint. Everything would work out right)
My dad went several steps ahead; he had done an akhand paath (continuous reading from start to end) of SGGS ji almost entirely on his own. He believed that God and he existed for each other. His favourite hymn was:“Jo maange thakur apne te soii soii deve,
(Whatever you ask from Him, He gives)Nanak, das mukh se jo bole eehaan uhaan sach hove.”
(Whatever God’s servant speaks (in prayer), one way or the other it becomes true)What about my mom? Well, in my entire life with her I never saw her ask for anything because she felt that Waheguru already knew her needs more than her and would provide without asking.
What about me? I believe my dad and mom were God. Actually, it is not right to use the past tense for God; they are God. And I believe they are still teaching me.
- Value of Things. When you have plenty, you take many things for granted. However, scarcity teaches you to value whatever you have. More than anything, you learn the value of enough. Suddenly you become very very rich. You preserve. You don’t waste. Just three days before my mom went to the hospital for the last time last year she went to the kitchen (almost crawled there because she was barely able to walk) and taught our maidservant how to make ghee from the milk-cream so that it wasn’t wasted.
- Scarcity Makes One Stronger. The most beautiful aspect of scarcity is that instead of making one weaker, it actually makes one stronger. Imagine that someone is trying to hurt or punish you by depriving you of something. However, you already have come through deprivation and you know how to go through it. The scheming guy is made to look small and like an idiot. When I was in school I read through a book called ‘Lights Along The Shore’. It was about a Christian priest in Stalinist Russia, sent to a concentration camp in Siberia. In order to humiliate him and break his will, he was asked to clean ten latrines everyday. In the night he thought and thought how to get out of the imposed humiliation. By the morning he had the solution: he started cleaning twenty of his own free will.
- Character. I believe dealing with scarcity made me a charactered person, ethical and disciplined. For example, I never owe anything to anyone; I repay as soon as possible. In the month of April this year we had a get-together of my music group Yaad Kiya Dil Ne. Everyone was to contribute his/her share. There is a person five times richer than me. Despite dozens of reminders he didn’t pay even though he had the maximum guests. I won’t ever call upon myself such dishonour.
- There is Always a Way Out. Scarcity teaches you that nothing is impossible. If you look at it the right way, with a calm mind, there is always a solution. A person who has dealt with scarcity is unlikely to get defeated by a situation.
- Empathy. A person who has dealt with scarcity learns to have empathy for others who are going through bad situations even after he himself has got out of it. My father had this habit of feeling for others and give to them; it has percolated down to all three of us children.
- Humility and Modesty. It also follows that even after one gets out of scarcity (for example now I have), one is never haughty or arrogant about it. One learns to be humble, modest and grateful: “God, you put me in a situation to give me some valuable lessons and tools how to get out of it. Now, God, with your help, I am out of it. Make me humble enough to realise that without your help I couldn’t have managed even a fraction of it.
In the end, I can say with adequate pride and confidence that Scarcity taught me more than Plenty would have. God and my parents (there is, like I said, no difference between the two) facilitated this learning. Sri Guru Granth Sahib ji, as ordained, has always been the trigger to such learning.
At my bedside there is a copy of a book ‘Miracles of Ardas*’ written by the Himalayan Legend, Padma Bhushan and Arjuna Award winner mountaineer Captain (of the Indian Navy) MS Kohli. It too keeps reminding of my dad’s favourite hymn from Sri Guru Granth Sahib ji:
Jo maange thakur apne te soii soii deve.
*Ardas = Prayer
Very true Sir.
I could connect with all that you have shared, as I grew up in similar circumstances.
Material scarcity helps us grow.
Pride, arrogance and moral poverty leads to downfall.
Regards
Cdr Rajendr Pawar
Thank you. Moral poverty is the actual poverty. Very rightly brought out by you.